Unfinished [PewDieCry]

Unfinished

I've never really been a fan of hospitals. When you've been to one for a while, you learn to get tired of it.  You get used to the food and the tacky clothing, the constant smell of antibacterial old people, the overly-kind doctors, and even the annoying beeping of the heart monitor.

Oh yeah, I'm currently in one, if you were wondering. No? You could tell? Great.

But you probably want me to tell you why.

That, will be for later, friend. Let's not rush things here. Okay?

Okay.

Let me throughly introduce myself. My name is Cry. I'm also know as Cryaotic or ChaoticMonkey, as that is my actual username on YouTube. And if the person reading this is in the future, and you have no idea what the hell YouTube is, let's just say you missed out on viral videos, gaming nerds, animation, AMVs, and a whole lot of porn.

On this website, I'm known for a few things. An amazing voice--also described as sexy, handsome, and easy to masturbate to. That, and a mysterious persona. I don't show my face, and I try to keep as much information on my personal life from my fans. Because, not only would thousands of people knowing who you are and where you live be creepy... but my fans like the mystery.

In all actuality, I didn't have a camera when I first started. When I uploaded my first five or so videos on YouTube, the subscribers I did have, went CRAZY. They were emailing me nonstop saying to hurry my ass up and get a camera, so they could see what my face looked like. It was very annoying, so just out of spite, I never got the camera, and I kept my face hidden. Soon, people started subscribing to my channel. Saying that the mystery was worth it. So I kept playing along, before I realized all the benefits hiding my face gave me.

So, let me tell you what I'm not.

Despite many peoples beliefs; I am, in fact, not depressed. Shocking, I know. I don't cut myself, nor have I ever. I don't constantly think about suicide, and nor will I ever commit it if my lover, and/or crush doesn't love me back. I am an invert and a little shy, though. I really like solitude and staying inside, although I go outside every now and then, mentally cursing to myself as the bright sun hits my eyes.

Next, however cool it may be, I don't wear a mask. Back to me being anonymous: If I were to constantly wear a mask, don't you think people will be suspicious of a twenty-something dude wearing a mask that looks very similar to that of the face of Sup Guy, who just so happens to be Cryaotic's mascot of sorts? Not only that, but its pretty much a known fact that Cryaotic lives in florida, where this masked man was seen?

Yes, yes they would be.

You were probably wondering why I'm writing this in a hospital, and why I'm in one. Well, I'll put it simple really.

I'm dying.

It was a little blunt I know; but I didn't know how to put it another way. Oh, and I'm actually not in a hospital, either.

I'm in a house now....I guess I was hallucinating again.

I, myself, don't know why I'm writing down pointless things my friends already know. How will they react, I wonder, to my body on the floor. My dead corpse blocking the door, making it hard to push open. I feel as though my disease is writhing in my skin; under my fingernails and in my skull. It disgusts me, what cancer can do to you.

I couldn't....I couldn't go to a hospital. I couldn't handle the constant beeps, the constant primping of my pillow, the quiet whispers of nurses. The loud cries of my loved ones as I left them, lying weakly in white-washed rooms, with dying flowers laying limp on my bedside table. I couldn't handle it. I knew I was going to die. I had no cure, no hope. I didn't understand why I was forced to be locked in there while I wanted to be in my home, dying in my bed.

So that's why I left.

I left in the middle of the night, when most of the nurses were gone. I grabbed my clothes and ran out the door to my house. To my room, where I lay. I wanted to die in peace, not in the faces of my sad loved ones.

I already recorded a video before my breath became too laboured and I had to stop, only able to click upload as I fell to the ground. I didn't bother with only doing voice, I used a camera I bought not too long ago. I owe it too my subscribers, they should see what I look like before I die. Too bad my dying face is the only thing they're ever going to see.

It's at 53% uploaded right now.

Oh wait....my phone's ringing. It's my friend Pewds. I won't answer it. I'm already at peace. Hearing his frantic pleads for me to go back to that dreaded place will break that. I wouldn't stand it.

Hearing the person I love cry.

I guess it's out, isn't it? The famous Cryoatic is gay, for Pewds. Rack up the imagination level because fanfictions are going to be everywhere.

65% uploaded.

My hands are hurting as I write this, my bones are brittle. My handwriting is becoming sloppier, I know. I'm thinking back on my life, realizing that sitting on my chair playing video games isn't really much to look back on. But I'm thinking about Pewds. His bright blue eyes twinkling misheviously, his blonde hair carelessly swept to the side. I think I see him, If I can just reach out and...

Another cruel hallucination.

76% uploaded.

My eyes are closing, but I'll keep writing. I'll keep writing because I owe it to my subscribers, my friends, my family. To Pewds. I owe it to Pewds. I can hear a car pulling up into the driveway. Too bad for them, I locked the door. They can't get in.

82% uploaded.

Will I be able to die without seeing them? May I? I don't know If I want to or not, now. I crave to see Pewds one last time, but at the same time I don't want to. Don't want him to see me like this.

I think I can hear him calling out to me. 'Cry!' He's shouting. I bet he's a hallucination too. Mind, stop playing tricks on me.

95% uploaded.

He's pounding on the door now. Is he here? Is he really here? He's calling my name, pleading for me to open the door. I can't, Pewds. I can't.

96%

He went away, only to come back and try to break the door open. Pewds....pewds stop. You can't help me now.

97%

I'll write it though. I'll write how much you mean to me. I don't mind. I should've done that at the beginning of this paper.

98%

My life is slowly draining out of my body. I can feel it slowly slip away. You almost have the door completely open.

Pewds...

99%

I just wanted to tell you that I....

100%