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A/N: heyy guyss! how are you doing? I hope you like this chapter, if you like this chapter don't forget to comment and vote. xxxx







Selena

Have you ever just stayed up all night because you were too lost in your thoughts? Well I have. All night I kept thinking about my life. I know this must sound so cliché and maybe I sound like such a romantic right now but all night one person was continuously on my mind and that person was Harry.

Tonight was nice. It was was better than I expected honestly. But there has been one thing that has been on my mind the entire night. Even before Louis and Eleanor came. Am I still in love with Harry? The real question should be did I ever even stop loving him? I forgave him, I know that I did. But do I still love him?

......

The next morning I was awoken by phone buzzing by my side. God. I want to sleep. Scratch that. I need to sleep.

Ugh. I press answer and press my phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Sel. Don't tell me you're still in bed right now." Nina warns.

"It's a Sunday and it's" I remove my phone from my ear and check the time,"9:50 am. I don't think I should be out of bed this early." I whine.

"We had brunch planned remember?" I can picture Nina rolling her eyes at me.

"Oh shit."

"Yeah no shit. Thank God I called before reaching the place."

"We can still make it? I can quickly get ready!" I offer.

"No Sel, our reservation was at 10. It's already 9:53. Plus you know how crowded that place is. We'll have to wait another hour."

"You're right."

"Well I'll just get breakfast from McDonald's and come over." Nina says.

"Aww you're the best." I smile into the phone.

"I know. Now you need to get out of bed soon. I'll be there in half an hour." Nina says.

"Okay. See you soon."

"Bye." Nina hangs up and I put my phone aside.

Time for me to get up. My bed is so comfortable. Why? I just hate mornings. I'm not and never am going to be a morning person no matter what. Whatever it's not time to complain right now. I hop out of my bed and head to the shower. I need to at least look alive before Nina gets here.

.....

"So how was the big date?" Nina asks rather bitterly.

"Come on. Don't be like that." I give her a look.

"Be like what? I'm acting like my usual self." Nina lies.

"Yeah okay Nina."

"I'm sorry if I'm a little pissed about the fact that you've been in frequent contact with your ex who broke your heart for over a month now and you just went on a date with the guy last night!" Nina spats angrily.

Nina puts her food down and looks at me,"Look I'm sorry for my tone. But can you blame me for not understanding why you're considering getting back together with a guy who broke you?"

"I never thought I would be that girl who would go back running to a guy who broke her heart. But I guess I was wrong. I'm just one of those pathetic desperate girls." I say.

"You're not desperate Selena. You're just in love." Nina says.

"You really think I am still in love with Harry?"

"Come on Selena. You never really stopped loving him and you know that. You'd be lying to yourself if you said you weren't in love with him. Look at how fast your forgave him. You would never do that if you ever hated him." Nina says.

"I don't want to Nina. I want to move on and be happy without him but I can't do it. I believe him when he says he's still in love and that he won't hurt me again. I don't want to but I can't do anything. Why am I like this? Maybe I'm just a gullible person and I'm not in love with him. Or maybe I am a desperate."

Nina moves closer to me and holds my hand,"Look. Sel. We've all been there. We just can't help it. When we love someone we chose to see the best in them and there's really nothing wrong with that unless everyone around you knows that your significant other is an asshole. I don't think Harry is an asshole or a bad guy. I do believe he loves you truly but I'm just mad at the stunt he pulled up three months ago. I just don't want to see you hurt again. But Selena, this is all you. No one can really tell you what to do. If you think Harry is the one then girl go for it. I'm here for you and I'll be happy for you but if you don't think it will work out of the two of you, I'm here for then too. Just think about what you want." Nina smiles at me.

What if I have no idea what I want?

"Hey. It's going to be fine. Sel, you know what you want. Just don't be afraid to get it. It's going to be fine." Nina flashes a reassuring smile my way.

"Yeah. I guess you're right." I smile at her weakly.

"Come on cheer up a little Sel. You want to me to help you talk through all of this?" Nina suggests.

"I don't know Nina. Sometimes I think about how hard it would be to manage life without Harry and how hard the past three months have been but then again sometimes I feel like I haven't even forgiven him yet. I just hate him and I can't ever trust him. If you were in my position would you get it another try?" I ask.

"I don't know if you remember but during your senior year of college, I got back together with Josh after he had walked out of our three year relationship saying he wasn't ready and was terrified of things getting too serious. I went back to him didn't I? And a few months later we were engaged. Now look at us, we're happier than ever. Times get harder sometimes and you just need to be together and support each other. If you really believe in Harry do what you need to do Sel. No one can really help you out with any of that." Nina says.

"Thanks for always being my personal duty free psychologist." I smile at Nina.

"Well I am your best friend aren't I?" Nina smiles at me.

"Yeah you are sometimes." I joke.

"Please. I'm your one and only." Nina says.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night babe." I smirk at her.

"Just shut up and eat your hotcakes." Nina demands jokily.

"Okay bro. I'm eating."

.....

It was 6:45, it had been an hour since Nina had left. I pick up my phone and dial a number on my phone.

After two rings the person picks up,"Hello?"

"Hey it's me."

"You sound a little down. Are you okay love?" Harry's voice was laced with concern.

"Yeah I'm fine. Are you doing anything right now?" I ask.

"I just got back home from Zayn and Gigi's. Millie is spending the night there. Why? What's up?" Harry asks.

"I wanted to talk to you. If it's not too much of a hassle can you come over?" I ask.

"Yeah sure. I'll be there in half an hour." Harry says.

"Okay."

"See you soon. Bye." Harry says.

"Bye." I say and hang up the phone.

Now all that is left for me to do is wait and wait. God I really hope I'm making the right decision. If I'm being sure of what I want and need.

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