The Joker to my Harley Quinn

It went a little like this

Its 2016, school has been going on for about 3 weeks now. Me and J always kinda said hi to each other periodically, I thought he was a really cool person and I kinda wanted to get to know him more. We high-fived in the halls a lot. He continued trying to date every girl he saw and being his smart ass self while doing it. And fuck, this is when everything started. All of it. I started liking him. I thought it was just an innocent fucking crush. Oh my god if I could go back to the day when I even caught a glimmer of feelings for this son of a bitch id try to warn myself. Hell, I could try but I probably wouldn't believe me. The high fives eventually turned into hugs, hugs turned into mini conversations, conversation turned into flirting and then one day. One FUCKING day, I got a dm. September 5th of 2016 " Holley, you want to go out with me" I reply " oh wait up, uhm what about k ?" K being his girlfriend from a day prior ... " we broke up " I was so stupid I didn't even realize how weird it was that he just switched from girl to girl "ok uhm, gimmie like 1 min to think about it " I thought, but not enough "Ok I guess I will go out wit u I'm just confused I didn't think you liked me like that" ( I'm literally copy and pasting messages from a year ago ) "I do, Just i never had the chance to tell u, But i wanted to for a long time" he then tells me how he's been wanting to go out with me for over a year, I just was shocked , thinking " wow he had feelings for me that whole time even through all of his relationships ". I hate that I had no idea what was coming to me. Yay, I had a boyfriend, woopity doo, right ? He had a paragraph to another girl on his page the first day we were dating, I called him out, he said sorry. I was like " oh ok hahaha " and it was fine, yeah I was an idiot I know. He took it down though, that day we made plans to see each other after school. I was really nervous. It was alot of pressure since I was pretty new to the whole dating thing, atleast it being serious. We met under a gazebo next to his old bus stop, which is just down the street to my house. I remember hugging for a really long time and then we started walking. I remember him commenting on how weird it was that I swing my arm really high when I held his hand. I just said " its a habit I guess " but I think I was just so happy that I couldn't help myself. The whole time I was with him I was smiling like an absolute idiot. We kept talking and walking for about 10 minutes until he says " hey I wanna show you something " I'm confused of course, I look around and ask " what ? What do you mean ? " he replies " just wait until these cars pass " there were 2 behind us. One passed and the other parked at their house. He just grabbed my hand and pulled me in front of him. He kisses me. Not a normal kiss, oh no. This boi had the AUDACITY to try and French kiss me. This was my first French kiss so I had no idea what to do. I just stood there my eyes open really wide, and I didn't move like, at all. Wow I was so awkward. I eventually pulled back after 2 uncomfortable seconds and just was stunned and grabbed his hand and kept walking. I say " well ok wow, I literally only had my first kiss like 2weeks ago" which I had, it was this lesbian pool party my "friend",*we were a little bit more than friends at that point* threw and she told me to kiss her so I did. He is shocked and says " 2 weeks ago ??? " I explained exactly what I just explained to you and the conversation turned into me babbling about my ex's somehow and getting really sad. I had to leave though at this point cause I wasn't supposed to leave the house for over 30 minutes and it had probably already been longer. We sat under the gazebo again after I gather my thoughts and finally tell him I had to leave. We hugged for a really long time again. He tried to go in for a kiss again, and of course I hesitated and said " no " so he kissed me on the cheek. It was so cute so I just smiled really hard and looked into his eyes and hugged him some more.  I said " goodbye, I love you " he said the same thing. I started walking to my house, and he stayed behind for a while and when I was really far away he yelled "you're beautiful " god I was so happy. I came home and my mom started questioning me, and I just said I saw a friend and stopped to say hi. Yeah, a friend.