His sunshine

2

How odd that a girl with as much anxiety and built up fear could fall asleep so easily in the muscular arms of a boy I had nearly just met. He was so comforting yet so uneasy. I'll never forget the feeling of everything about that night. The sounds of summer air, the smell of summer and wet grass, the taste of relaxation.
My eyes were tough to open over the caked make up crusted in the corners of my eyelids. I never managed to get in the shower last night due to Todd taking me for the night. I was confused where I was when I woke up, I looked around and saw Todd still sound asleep. I was confused as to how I had a thick blanket over me. I sat up as my eyes adjust to the yellow morning sun. I spotted a small piece of paper folded up and set next to my phone. I picked it and unravel it.

Mom will kill you if she finds out about this. I got your back tho and you owe me. You're welcome for the blanket. Also I ship u guys so hard! I left the our bedroom window unlocked for u to sneak back in.
-Hailey

I didn't want to wake Todd up but on the other hand I didn't want to leave him out here. I sat there staring at him for a little bit trying to figure out what to do. I was hoping that if I stared at him long enough he'd miraculously wake up, but that wasn't an option. I was scared to wake him up. I really needed to head back inside though before I get caught. I wasn't supposed to sleep out here. It's not like we did anything bad in fact I don't exactly remember what we even did I was so tired.
I tried tapping lightly on his shoulder; that did nothing.
He rolled over landed on my lap. His eyelashes fluttered and his eyes opened.
"Good morning Tay" he smiled.
"Good morning" I hesitated to say.
"Everything alright?" His voice is raspy, somehow calming and soothing at the same time. I don't know where I'm going with this, I can't fall in love with a stranger. He's just a crush- he's just a crush.

'He's just a crush' I kept repeating in my head.
"Ya I'm good" I lied, I feel dizzy. I feel bad. Call me a sissy or a baby, I was hiding this little 'sleepover' from my own mom. The women who gave birth to mean! She's going to kill me. Todd decided we should should probably get me home before trouble rolled around. Todd walked me home; it was a silent two minute walk from his uncles backyard to my backyard. I lightly tapped on the window cringing, I hate the sound of glass being vibrated if you haven't picked that up yet. I tapped the glass anyways signaling Hailey to open it up for me. Todd stood beside me to make sure I got in the house alright. Hailey's distinctive morning face appeared on the other side of the window.
"That's Hailey?" Todd figured. I nodded up and Hailey pulled the window up.
She propped her elbows up against the window ledge and rested her face into her hands grinning.
"Well well well" she teased.
"Move and let me in" I tried pushing my way inside the house.
"Really, I couldn't end your summer just by telling mom; is that really how you're gonna talk to me." She laughed sarcastically, Todd's laugh echoed behind hers.
I huffed my breath and rolled my eyes "please let me in Hailey."
"She's cute when she's mad" Todd cooed to Hailey.
"You should see her when she's hangry" Hailey whispered as she helped pull me in by my arms. I shot her a dirty look. There's no way I'm sneaking out ever again.
"Need a lift" Todd asked using his hands to raise my feet up. I pushed up off his hand and crawled inside. Hailey left the room. I looked at Todd who was still standing outside.
"See ya" he smirked.
"See ya" I repeated.

I walked into the kitchen where mom was cooking bacon. The sound of the bacon sizzling filled the kitchen and living room area.
"Sleep well?" Elly popped into the kitchen while looking at her phone.
"Yah" I answered lying through my teeth. A little white lie never hurt anyone once in a while, right? Breakfast sucked. I hate eating breakfast it makes me feel bloated all morning. I eat it anyways to make Elly happy since she spends time preparing it and mom helps, but back at home I never eat it. I wish I was back at home. Though if I was back at home I wouldn't have met Todd.
I can't see me and Todd being anything more than friends, he's just a crush anyways. Who am I kidding I could never get a older guy like Todd. I stood in front of the long body mirror staring at myself.
I had pieces of black mascara crumbled underneath my eyes and eyeliner smeared on the left side of my face. 'Ew my hair is gross' I thought to myself. The long Carmel brown hair was knotted and tangled into a bun. I felt extremely exhausted. I sat down only an inch from the mirror and stared into my own eyes. I want to see what other people see when they talk to me. I looked at my light blue eyes and my freckles. Sometime I just like thinking to myself. I wonder how many freckles are on my nose? Only god knows.
I opened my phone and received a text from Lexi.
U won't believe what happened today!!!!!
Hayden Jonson was at this party I was at and he said he'd for sure smash u.
I was confused at first until I really thought about it. I sorta forgot what life was like back in Indiana, I set it aside to spend my summer in this small quiet kept away neighborhood. I liked Hayden Jonson since my sophomore year of high school. I was douche bag but his dirty blonde hair and green eyes made up for it. I missed Hayden and I missed Lexi. I miss home, I'm home sick.
I miss Friday night football games under the lights. Lexi and I always made signs for Hayden to support him. I mostly remember the sign that was made on a black poster board that said "defense" in red glitter. I remember it because Hayden took a picture with me and the sign. After the moment was captured by an Iphone. Hetook his red helmet off and pushed his long sweaty hair back. Everyone started whispering and giggling. Hayden ducked his head down to my level and pressed his lips against mine. That was my first kiss.

-

August 29, 2010

Today was my last day of summer in Portland. I was ready to be home again. Oh how I can't wait to be in my own room surrounded by the white lavender walls.
Elly helped me load my suitcase into the trunk of her Honda Civic. I could clearly see her eyes watering, but I pretended I didn't notice because crying makes her feel weak. When she cries she feelings like her breaking point has been met, and her breaking point can't be met. She's a strong women. She hasn't admitted to crying since her husband of three years left her.
"Allergies" she laughed wiping her eyes. She knew we knew she was crying.
"I'm just gonna miss you guys so much" the water works were really flowing now. I held her close to me and hugged her. Part of me wanted to cry. I can't cry unless I'm really hurt or emotionally damaged. In this case I was not injured nor emotionally hurt.
Elly kissed my forehead and we all loaded into the car. As we pulled out of the driveway I caught a glimpse of the brick house and the tree house standing tall in the backyard. My heart skipped a beat. I forgot about Todd, for I haven't seen him in a week.
I thought about him and missed him, but it's to late I can't say goodbye now, I'm heading home to Indiana. Oh well, it's not like anything between us was going to happen between us. We'd both go home to our home states and go to college like normal kids and move on with our lives. We were just friends we didn't have anything.