Tiny Dots

Andria

Hello there people of all sorts, welcome to this..this thing that I have no clue what it is. I'm trying something new. I've been listening to La Dispute like crazy, and they cease to dissapoint me with their amazing lyrics. They tell a story, that I can see in my head. I decided to try to bring those stories out my own way, and this gets dark and really depressing...

He sat and thought about her, all of the things they did together. He was so set on finding out what happened to them.
Looking at the past was hard, like blooming daisies without giving them a single drop of water. It brought back old memories. Older than what he wanted. He didn't want to remember his car crash years ago. He didn't want to remember the storm that took his best friend. He didn't want to remember the shooting that happened on his street when he was a child. But he couldn't forget. It was hard to forget.
He sighed and look onward, reimagining them, those happy moments that were captured in time. He smiled, white pristine teeth protruding, uncovered from his lips. It didn't last long.
It stopped once he realized he was no longer with her. That happiness would not come back..unless she changed her mind. He didn't think she ever would, considering how long it had been since they talked. He wrote her notes every day, but he never mailed them. He wanted to, he so badly wanted to, but he knew deep down she would never respond. 
He had a pile sitting on the desk. The place where his elbows were, holding his heavy head up. The day was dreary, raining, cold, it for it being spring anyways. He leaned back and closed his eyes, thinking about the last time he saw her. They were at the airport. He had to drive, she didn't have a car, and family member was gonna go pick her up. It was the worst day of his life, his love gone. He had hated airports ever since.

"I know, just wait there for me until the plane lands." She put down her phone into the cup holder angrily,  she was already pissed. Going back to her family, already hurt, but it was as bad as what he felt.
He handed her the bags, tears building up in his eyes. She was everything to me, and he was quickly losing her.
She wouldn't talk to him whenever he tried, He would only get looks of annoyance. She was fed up with still being with him. Moving on was going to feel so much better.
He never felt that way.
She pulled her hair away from her eyes, looking at him for the last time. And look of sorrow glazed over them.
"Thank you for the ride." She spoke softly. She tried her best not to make a forced thank you, sincerity was difficult.
A small "You're welcome," came from him when she shut the door. His eyes welled up with tears, even worse as they. The little rain droplets ran down his slim face.
And anger filled him, enraged him as he hit the wheel with his fist, the horn beeped loudly as he did it another time, and another, and the next. He couldn't control his emotions, the rush of happiness and belonging escaped his body. This love had felt so real and it was gone. She said she felt no connection, she was bored. He was in love. He had never known love so pure, but he didn't know.

He didn't know.

Now this is the part where I cut in, this gets really dark so be prepared.

He slowly got up from his spot at the desk, he was overrun with sadness.
Then it seemed like music played, softly in the back round of his head. The song was speaking to him, softly. He pictured himself onstage, people telling him to get off. He obeyed.

This was his last moments.

He walked slowly into the basement, grazing his fingers around walls, searching for something. A glimpse of the object caught his eye. A metal object, it could do some harm.
He walked back up and to his desk, getting out a small piece of paper. On it, he wrote with his best handwriting. His imagination was coming back. He wrote the words that he could never speak. He was unable to.
He finished writing, a tear falling out onto the paper.
The metallic object was glistening, he picked it up, held it in his hands ever so shaky at first.  After a few seconds the feeling had become bliss. The cold metal against his hands. He wasn't afraid of death anymore. He wanted it, he wanted death to clasp him into her long embrace.
The shaking started again as he set the object to his temple. The cold feeling set in. It was happening,  really happening. There was that feeling of bliss again. Calm. Calm before the storm perhaps.
He heard the sound of his finger pulling a little piece back, he breathed heavily. Admiring the silence.
His weak fingers held onto another piece. A trigger, a name which he knew very well. There was a small push, against his head. The item was right against it. And he was ready. He squeezed it, the sound of death beckoning him..

The eardrum damaging bang was heard. He was gone. Wrapped into the arms of death. As she had been waiting to love him.

Laying still on the desk was that paper. The small paper that held his last words on it. And it read, speaking clearly, "As life stops loving me and left on a plane, death will come for me soon after. And I am quick to embrace death."