My cousin gave me genital herpes,
They look like poo.
When I rub my fingers against it,
It splurges out goo.
I loved thinking about the time my cousin and I spent together, how manly he was when his big beer belly rubbed against me.
"Have my children"
He purrs into my ear.
It was almost as big of a turn on as when I saw my cat got run over.
I instantly creamed.
I always loved going to my cousins house late and night, lying next to his big hairy body. As he snores and farts in his sleep, it's adorable.
But this time when I went over to my cousins house, he wasn't lying in bed sleeping. No.. he was far from that. Right as I opened the window on the barn he sleeps in, I saw it.
Him plunge a telescope up another mans ass.
I mean, I know I'm only half man! And cousin was upset over such things.. but he didn't have to cheat on me!!!!1!1!1!1!!1!
"MIKE MATT LAUTENDOUCHE!!!"
I couldn't contain my anger as I grabbed his favourite hockey stick and smashed it across the back of his head. Hitting him so hard that it snapped in half.
He was so shook he didn't even try and stop me as I repeatedly stabbed him with a half of the hockey stick.
All while cousins play thing couldn't contain it anymore. He jizzed right over cousins lifeless corpse.
