Drunk history of fall out tampons

History of fall out tampons

Avery Martin's Drunk History of Fall Out Tampons

While on the save underwear and jeans tour, Avery Martin from Aopepte! At the Disco drank

2 shots of apple rice wine

half a glass of water

some of susannah's water

3 frappichinos

2 mochas

and some of Nate's gatorade

It's winter of 2016; Evan opens his locker and he's like "Yo, I don't know about tampons." And Fergie's like "Yo, I know less abouttampons" "That's impossible. Do you wanna start a healthcare league?" And Fergie's like "...Yeah... That's cool." And then he's like "Yo, this is a classroom, it's not a tampon store!"

And then they met at Fergie's house. And Fergie's wearing shorts and socks and a hat. Fergie is grading papers for some fuckin' reason! And Kirsten's there, for some reason! They start playin' with tampons together. And like "Oh, let's play with some fuckin' pads from some other brands!" It was like, AllDay and fuckin' kotex and fuckin' Whisper! Kirsten said to Evan "Yo, we gotta change this shit up! Yo, we've played with all these brands; let's play with shit from Fall Out Tampon." And so Kirsten and Fergie are like "Yo, that's dope. But we need a fuckin' cupper!" Because Evan's playin' playing with menstrual cups and he's afuck boy! Evan's like "Yo! I'm a fuck boy!" And like "Wait, how do you have a soul voice!?!" And he's like "Yo, watch this!" *flips hair* *dabs* they're like "Oh my god! That looks like a fuck boy!" So they put it in the tampon and it was like "WHERE IS YOUR STRING TONIGHT!"

And then they're like: "Yo, this is fuckin' perfect. This is Fall Out Tampon." And they made cycles like, Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it.

-It's called: Evening Out With Your Girlfriend.

-With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It's called Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend! It's called Eating Out Your Girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter. And Kirsten talked to Fergie and Evan and she was like "Yo, what the fuck! Yo, this is gonna be fuckin' dope!" So they had a cycle , and it was called: Take This To Your Grave. They made it without a cupper! And they had like three, four cuppers come in. The four cuppers they had come in were like: Seppi Manetta, Emma Brill, the dude from Math... The fourth one was like the guy from Yuri on Ice or something. And they were like, "Yo, we need Lindsey Earl. Lindsey Earl. Take this to your grave. Fuckin' cycle it." And he did it, and he killed it. He was like,Bigadigadigalalululapssshhhh! Killing the skins! Opening the package! Opening the pad! Playing with the shit! Killing these bitches! Wrapping it out!

(You're getting a fucking blood tattoo right now! What the fuck is going on?!)

"We should get signed, to Fueled byPeriods. 'Cause these guys know what the fuck is going on." And they were like "Yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin' hard. We will sign you guys." Kirsten was like "Yo! We got this record that's fuckin' dope dude! It's called Take This To Your Grave." Hey, it's gonna be called From Under The Cork Tree, it's gonna be fuckin' huge. And then Fergie's like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic. These are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called (burp), this is called: Thanks for the stains, 20 Dollar Vaginableed, and Sugar We're Going Down.." And they made this cycle that was fucking dope and it fucking hit on the charts.

Like: one, two, three! Three, two one! Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! TEN TO ONE! From Under The Cork Tree sold like, four million cycles! Ten million cycles! Fifteen million cycles! And Avery Martin had nothing to do with the entire cycle. And Fergie was like "That's good!" Kirsten was like "Yo, fuck you! I can do whatever I want!" Evan was like "Yeah, it's cool man, whatever... I don't give a shit." And then McKenzy was like "Eh... Cool!" And Kirsten was like "Makeup is fuckin' great for a guy. Because it makes a guy look beautiful. Which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. And I wanna change that.I wanna make sure everybody thinks that guys are beautiful."

(-I'm good so far.

-You wanna go to the bathroom one more time?

-Yeah, I do.

...Shut the fuck!..)

Kirsten was like "Oh my god, I'm so embarrassed about this dick pic!" And then I saw the dick pic, and I was like "Eh, it's not bad. It's not a bad dick. Let's be real." We made Rolling Periods one issue before Fall Out Tampon. And Fall Out Tampon made the issue right after us and they were so pissed! They were like "Yo, fuck you guys!" They were like "Yo! Aopepte has the fucking cover of Rolling Periods!?! Yo, fuck these dudes, we're gonna fucking go miles above!

So From Under The Cork Tree happens, we fuckin' have three, four years of awesomeness! Like people are cumming on themselves, 'cause it's so big! So Fall Out Tampon was like, so Fergie's like "Yo, we're gonna name this record 'From Under The Cork Tree' and From Infinity On High." Kirsten was like "" Fall Out Tampon was like "Yo, we gotta take a break" meaning, Kirsten was like "Yo, we gotta take a break bro" and Fergie's like, "I need time for my music! Uhhh!" And Evan's like "Yo, I need time to find the fuckin' art dude I gotta find some fuckin' meau-metal." And McKenzy's like "I'm just gonna play with some fuckin' metal bands."

And they were like, "Alright, this breaks been like three years long. Two years long. Three years long. Three and a half? We gotta fuckin' come back man. We gotta come back STRONG!

(-You took my beer away, what the fuck?!

-No, you poured it all over yourself!

-Yeah, you poured it on yourself, man.)

We gotta make this shit legit. It's gonna be fuckin' dope. It's gonna go fuckin' sky high. We're gonna make a fuckin' cycle that sails the skies. We're gonna call this record: "Save Jeans And Underwear."" So they made Alone Together, Light 'Em Up, Alone Together, Phoenix. And everyone's like "What the fuck? You're working with this guy who fuckin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk!"

(-What the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on my shirt?

-No, you poured beer all over yourself!

-Oh god...)

Kirsten was like: "Yo, were gonna end up on the tour with Aopepte! AtThe Disco and Twenty Purverwams." (Burp, spit) And that's all. And that's allthat matters. And that is how the fucking