She says I'm depressed
She says I show all the symptoms
I say Im not depressed
I've only lost my appetite
And that's not because I'm melancholy saturate with misery
It's because the words welled up in my throat
Like the tears that sometimes slip
I'm not depressed
I feel trapped
I feel confused
I want to live
I want to live
God I just want to do what I want to do
And not in the stereo typical teenage annexed kind of way
But in that desire for freedom
To learn on my own
To not be afraid that anyone is a broken stone, I must be wary when stepping upon
I just want to have certainty and uncertainty
I want to live life the way it was before
before conformity
Before we lived in houses and the worst thing was bickering
Because trauma should happen when ones limbs are ripped apart
By that starving lion, just trying to survive like I am
Because you should be worried about dying, work for survival
Not work for imaginary systems and paper rectangles
Not to be controlled and not to be scared into injections
Did you know they kill thousands
Did you know they cripple trillions
Did you know it's all to keep it alive, to keep you contained
I don't want a part of this and I'd hate to see you content with it
I'd rip my self limb from limb of this
So you see, I'm not depressed, not suicidal
I'm just scared of rotting away like the birds that just sit in their cage
Like the fish that just swim in a pond just waiting to be lured
I simply just deserve to live, at least in somewhat, a relative freedom
I just want to breathe.
And I think you deserve this too.
