Many of us have the struggle with describing who we are.
Sometimes, we have trouble with finding ourselves.
Sometimes, we stifle ourselves too much.
But I want to introduce an idea in here to you. It is not mine, but it belongs to Dushka Zapata, who is the author of How to be ferociously happy: and other essays.
In this world, she says, we are obsessed with finding ourselves and being understood. But that is like chasing moving target; we change.
So how do we find ourselves? Be ourselves?
You surrender yourself to the world's beauty. Love by the moment. Set yourself free. The easiest way to stop stifling yourself is NOT to stifle yourself. And yes, it sounds hard, but I interpret her message is forgetting about outside judgment and other people and see the beauty in things; as much as this matters authenticity I believe this also matters in "finding" the elusive happiness.
As for finding happiness, this is my own worldview. There's a quote I've seen: "Happiness is an inside job." From Mandy Hale. (I believe so; I'm tugging this out of my head and this isn't a complete quote). Happiness by external factors is only temporary. The happiness inside yourself is the knowledge that you are worth it and you are loved and the fact that you will make it through. The human soul is very resilient.
One other thing lots of people talk about: self-care. Self-love. You ever heard that you need to love yourself before loving someone else? I believe that's true. Because otherwise you're going to put emotional baggage on your partner and your partner and can only carry so much. And that, according to Dushka Zapata, is codependency, which is an unhealthy relationship. Establish a good, healthy relationship.
And that's how you shine.
