Losing Control

Denial

"Okay, what's going on? Your actually starting to scare me"

I sigh. Not knowing where to begin.

"Does it have to do with Ms. Roper?"

What the fuck?

I look over at her, my eyebrows raised.

"I saw how you two acted towards each other that day in the cafeteria."

Oh...

I forgot about that...

"Yes" I answer her question.

"What's going on?" She asks me taking my hand.

You can do this...

I take a deep breath.

"We've sort of been seeing each other."

She looks at me with an expression I can't read.

A few moments pass by and she still hasn't said anything, but she's still staring at me.

"Well are you going to say anything?"

Im nervous for her answer.

"What about her husband?" She asks.

I put my head in my hands.

I was hoping she wouldn't have brought it up...

"I know.. I feel like shit"

And I honestly did. I didn't know her husband. I didn't know if he was a good guy or not. I didn't know how he treated her. He could treat her like princess for all I know, and I'm cheating with his wife.

But when I looked at her, all of these worries dissapeared. She had that effect on me. She would wipe everything from my mind, except the feelings she gave me and the feelings I felt for her.

I had known this girl for nearly 6 months and over time she became something so important to me, that when I wasn't around her, I felt an emptiness inside and I couldn't explain it.

Months of staring at her, and spending time with her gave me a feeling I wasn't familar with, and to be honest, it sort of freaked me out.

"I know this, but it's like I can't help it. I mean, I know it's a choice to act on it but it's like there's something about her that pulls me in. A special force that connects us both. I think about her all the time, and when Im around her, she brings a feeling of saftey and calmness to me." I explain.

I look over to see Blossom taking in every word I say.

"Your in love with her"

What?

Is she crazy?...

"What? That's crazy, Blossom" I exclaim.

There's no fucking way that I'm in love with someone I only met nearly six months ago...

People don't fall in love that fast...

"Did you just hear yourself? Your eyes lit up when you were talking about her... You've got it bad..."

I just sat there, looking at her, shocked.

No.. no..

I can't be in love with my English teacher, whom I only met five months ago...

No...

"Go ahead, deny yourself but I see it, and as far as her husband goes, you need to figure it out, but I will say this..."

Blossom comes closer to me, looking me dead in the eyes.

"Do not let her go..."

She continues on "I can clearly see you two are meant for each other. I saw it in her eyes too. When you two were talking in the cafeteria. I saw the look she had in her eyes, when she was talking to you. I didnt know what it was at first, but I see the same look in your eyes when you talk about her. Now, I know."

I didn't know how to respond to what she was saying. It was hard for me to even comprehend.

I didn't want to even think about right now.

After a few moments, she looks over at me.

"I won't tell anybody, don't worry. I'll let you tell Jake and Carter,
when your ready."

I look at her, and smile.

How did I deserve such an amazing friend?...

"Okay, thank you Blossom. I love you"

"Yay! I love you too"

She pulls me in for a hug.

"Alright, we have to get to class"

I glanced over at my car radio seeing we had 5 minutes to get to class...