What if?

Chapter One: Curiosity Will Always Kill The Cat

//Wait to start song\\

I wake up, sweat pouring down my face like a waterfall. I keep having the same dream every night. Always the same people, same place, and same story. Every time I get closer and closer to what's beyond the the door and I just want to see.

I get out of bed almost tripping over my own feet, as I regain my balance, I hear a noise that sounds like muffled voices. I stand completely still, not even a small breath escapes my body. I step forward, the floor creaks underneath my weight, and the voices stop. My heart fills with fear as the door swings open and a female silhouette appears in the doorway. She slowly inches closer and closer to me, and I can't move. Once she gets into my sight range, I see her eyes are crystal blue, just like mine. Similar to the colour of the ocean on a sunny, summer day. Her hair is the same coffee brown colour as mine. Her face is exactly like mine, and it confuses me every time I sleep. She is the girl from my dreams. She reached out to me, before everything fades to black.

"Lucy, honey get up," my mom yells from down the hall.

"Damn, that felt so real," I mutter to myself, checking my phone to see the time. The digital clock reads 7:30, an hour early for school. I don't know why, but my mom always wakes me up super early.

Today is my third week at my new school considering we just moved from my dad's house considering he abandoned mom and I. I didn't want to recall my sixteenth birthday, the day that he went berserk and ran out on both of us. ever since we moved the dreams have came. I think the girl is me, because we look exactly alike, but she has a different, more mysterious aura about her. Her facial expression makes it seem as though she is traumatized  from witnessing a murder.

"Are you awake Lucy?" my mother's voice booms again, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yes," is all I say, jumping out of bed quickly and rushing to the bathroom.

Once I straightening my hair and doing my makeup, I throw on my usual shirt and skirt. It's a button-up pastel purple blouse with a black skirt. My friends call me pastel goth because I want to look like my idol, Melanie Martinez, but I call it my own style.

"Hurry up Lucy!" my mother screams, clearly getting more agitated by the minute. With a sigh I oblige and head into the kitchen for breakfast. Our kitchen is small, because we only need it for two people, one of which is hardly ever around anyways. Mom always leaves after work, comes here, gets something casual on, then leaves to do one of her many hobbies: drinking. She only arrives the next morning with sex hair because of her job. It's been like that since dad left us.

I hear a door slam, alerting me that my mom has left me, and that I'm on my own for the rest of the day. I don't even think she'd care if I skipped school. With a sigh a get my grey backpack and pull it on, before walking out the door. Instead of heading towards school I walked to the cemetery down the road. I really just wanted to be alone for a while.

I plug in my headphones.

//Start song now\\

I sit down beside the tree in the back and begin to recall the memories of my sixteenth birthday. The memory of him making tears come up into my eyes. I thought to the song promise me, the last one we had listened to together, the one playing right now. I realize that I'd never get to see him again, because of what happened. I know that walking out is a harsh way to put someone killing themselves, but I know he wasn't thinking about how mom and I would feel.

I had walked into the room with him and mom. They were smiling, though dad wasn't happy. As of recently he had been busy working, and we were extremely low on money at the time. He wasn't exactly the happiest, he only acted like it. I knew because I had walked in on him with a rope wrapped around his neck, mom crying beside him. He hadn't done anything, and I had no clue what it'd meant at the time, but I always tried to make him happy when I realized what was going on.

Mom had invited me to go shopping for my birthday, and I agreed, I wish that I hadn't now. Dad had to stay home because he said that he had some work to do, so mom and I just left. We didn't notice the sadness in his smile, though now that it's over I remember it distinctly, the way that it curved downward ever so slightly, and tears began to spring up in his eyes, the eyes that were the same colour as mine. 

When me and mom got back into the house, I was super excited to show dad what I had gotten to hear him say 'They're lovely Lucy-poo' but he didn't. I ran inside and straight to his office, where he would be if he was working as he said he would be, but he wasn't there. I then  checked his room and then I noticed water running in the bathroom. The door was slightly cracked, so I pushed open the door, to find the tub overflowing, running with red tinted water.

As I remember his dead cold eyes, tears begin to fall down my face. A faint scream escapes my lips, and I don't want to be here any more, I just want my dad to be there for me, to make mom be a mom again, to pester me, to make me feel better about myself. Though I know that will never be available to me again.

Just then I hear someone coming, the crunch of gravel under shoes alerting me. I look up to see a girl with purple hair and what I assume to be a lip ring based off of the gleaming coming from her mouth approaches me. She seems to be curious as to why I'm here, leaned against a grave, tears streaking my cheeks no doubt. She stood in front of me, but before she said anything, I ran.

I couldn't let anyone in. They say that ignorance is bliss, and thats for a reason.

One thing I do know other than that is that, curiosity always kills the cat.