How everything changed (One Direction fanfiction)

Chapter Nineteen - I Can't Give In

Harry's P.O.V

We were currently waiting in the emergency waiting room at the hospital. It has been at least and hour since we got here, making it about 4:30 in the morning. Zayn and the girls fell asleep. Liam was looking at a magazine. Louis was on twitter on his phone. Niall was staring into space and I was pacing back and forth.

"Harry, stop pacing back and forth. Your scaring me." Louis stated.

I looked at him and he stood up. He woke up Eleanor when trying to adjust her so she could continue sleeping, since she was laying down with her head in his lap. He walked up to me and placed his hands on my shoulders.

"Harry, she will be fine. Relax." I nodded in reply.

Just then a nurse walked in. She was an older lady. She had short, gray hair and wore baby blue scrubs. She was looking at her clip board. Everyone woke up except Perrie (who was leaning on Zayn's shoulder), and Danielle (who was leaning on Liam's shoulder).

"I'm looking for the guardian of Kathryn Rose." She asked.

"That would be me." Niall said, standing up.

"And me." I added.

"Okay, well she woke up about ten minutes ago. She was very dehydrated. She was stressed, depressed and her body temperature was very low causing the fainting and unconsciousness. She is doing better now and has fallen back to sleep."

"Can we see her?" I asked.

"Yes, but only four people at a time until visiting hours start and please stay quiet. don't wake her. She needs her sleep."

"Thank you." Niall replied.

"Room 213" With that she left.

I looked around the room.

"You go ahead. Liam and I will stay here with Perrie and Danielle and let them sleep. They were both up late." Zayn spoke.

"Okay" Louis replied.

"If El wants, she can stay here with us and try to sleep." Zayn offered.

"No thank you. I will stay with Louis." Eleanor replied.

"Okay then." Zayn added.

We all walked towards the end of the hallway, to Kathryn's room. I paused before opening the door.

"Are you okay, Harry?" Niall asked.

I nodded and quietly opened the door. I wasn't prepared for what I saw. She looked so fragile and weak. She had a heart monitor hooked up to her, along with a ivy to keep her hydrated. It broke my heart to see her like this. Tears started forming in my eyes. I walked next to the bed, looking down at her. She looked so peaceful.

"El and I are going to go get food. Do you want anything?" Louis asked.

"I'm going to come with you." Niall stated.

"Harry? Do you want anything?" Eleanor asked.

"Just get me a coffee please?" I asked.

"Sure thing." Louis commented.

They all left, shutting the door on their way out. I pulled a chair up to the bed and sat down. I grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it.

"Kathryn, love. I am so sorry. I shouldn't have let you leave. I am suppose to protect you and now you are lying in a hospital bed with a heart monitor and an ivy attached to you. I am so very sorry for not protecting you." I said quietly.

I felt her squeeze my hand. I looked down at hand and kissed it again. When I looked up at her she still had her eyes closed.

"I'm so sorry, love." I said again. "Please forgive me!" I begged.

"Harry?" My face lit up when I heard her voice.

"Yes love. What is it?" I asked calmly.

"Stop apologizing." She spoke.

Her eyes fluttered open.

"But it is my fault. I shouldn't have let yo-" I started to say, but she interrupted.

"It wasn't your fault, Harry. It was mine. I knew my limits, but I still pushed myself further. I shouldn't have even left the suit, but I did. There was nothing you could do about it." She told me, but I didn't believe her. I still felt like it was my fault.

"I could have done something. I could have made you stay. I could have kept you from going, but I didn't."

"I could have stopped you too, but I didn't either. I take part of the blame in this." Spoke a Irish accent from behind me.

I turned to see Niall, Louis and Eleanor standing there. Niall walked up beside the bed and handed me my coffee. I took it with my free hand and remained holding Kathryn's hand with the other. Louis and Eleanor walked around to the other side of the bed.

"No. I wouldn't have listened. I would have locked you out. Completely isolated myself. It was better this way." She told us.

We all looked confused.

"Love? What do you mean 'it was better this way'?" Louis asked.

She looked to him and then back to me. She sighed.

"I don't want to isolate myself. I'm afraid if I do I wont come back. I will be trapped, alone, depressed and never leave. I know you are worried. I love you guys and I don't want to put you threw what I put my parents and sister threw. It is selfish and I just cant do it. No matter how badly I want to........... I just cant." She started to cry.

I squeezed her hand and placed another kiss to the back of it. Louis place his hand on her shoulder. He was holding Eleanor's hand with his opposite hand.

"Sweetie, it isn't selfish if you isolate yourself. It is how you deal with things. We all understand." Eleanor spoke calmly.

"Listen, I have to go back to school at some point in the next two to three weeks. If I isolate myself I wont last at school. It will only get worse with everything going on there."

"Babe? What's going on at school?" Louis asked.

"Nothing. Everything is fine at school." She replied not looking at anyone.

"Love, what is it?" I asked giving her hand another small squeeze.

"Its stupid, don't worry about it."

"Hey, you can tell us. It's okay." Niall added.

"No I can't. You wouldn't understand." She replied.

"Would I understand?" Asked Eleanor.

"Probably better than the boys would."

"Why don't the boys leave and you and I can talk about it. Okay?" Kathryn nodded and we all looked at each other. "I will come get you when we are done. Okay?" We all nodded.

Niall, Louis and I left the room and walked back out to the waiting room. When we got there we found Zayn, Perrie, Liam, and Danielle asleep. I looked at the time and it was already 6:00 in the morning. We took a seat and waited for El to come get us.

Kathryn's P.O.V

I told Eleanor everything. I told her about Ty and Damien. I told her about what happened at the hospital and at the dance. I left out the scene on the bridge. That wasn't important. She didn't say a word the whole time. She just nodded her head to show that she understood. I was in tears most of the time. Soon a nurse came in to check on me and she found me in tears. I had just finished my story. The nurse asked Eleanor to leave so I could get some rest. They didn't want me depressed or stressed out so she said to wait tell actual visiting hours before any one else comes back. I wouldn't see anyone until 8:00, which is in an hour and 45 minutes. I decided to lay down and try to sleep again, but I couldn't. I wanted to cry and isolate myself. I had to fight it though. I needed someone with me so I wouldn't isolate myself. I was in need of company. Someone to save me. I can't let isolation take over. I had to stay strong. I can't give in.