Tick Tock

Noise

Dylan

💎💎💎

Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock.

Drip, drop, drip, drop.

Scritch, scratch, scritch, scratch, scritch, scratch, screeeeeeeeeeeeeech.

I screw my eyes shut, cover my ears. I hear everything they aren't hearing and it kills me. I try to bring myself in closer, try to protect myself from the sound, the noise, always there, always fighting to get inside me.

Click, click, click.

Impossibly loud, right beside me. An arm around me, holding me still. That slight rub on my arm, meant to comfort, a stab to my brain. Shh, shh. A soft scraping sound to my ears.

The clock ticks and tocks.

The lab sink drips and drops.

The chair leg scritches and scratches against the floor.

Heels click, cloth has a friction going shhhhhh.

The noises you hear, the noises you don't, the noises you ignore. All of this amplified times a thousand. The girl shouting down the hall, the flush of the toilet upstairs, high school life in general, all a conspiracy to make me go insane. To make me claw at my ears, to rock back and forth, to close my eyes to cover my ears to run away to make.it.stop.

Everything I do to help makes it worse, adding noise. No help for me, not anytime soon. Trapped in this useless body, mute and unable to speak out. Misdiagnosed by the doctors and shrinks. To them, one with a mental problem, autism they said, grating my ears. A severe case they said as I shook and begged them silently to make it stop. Permanent supervision they said as I struggled to escape it all, to turn off the noise, to have peace and quiet. Although, I don't think I will ever have quiet. I think it might be impossible. This super human hearing I have, a curse, destining me never to have rest. And no way to communicate, the scrape of the pencil, the click of the keys, all too much, too overwhelming.

Nothing is private, I hear it all.

All knowing I am, even when I want to be gone, ignorant, oblivious.

And so I shake and I pull away and I try to block it out.

After all, the only other way out is death.

And I know too much to die.

💎💎💎

Hope y'all like this, tell me what you think, and don't forget to vote.

-ReNNa