Just a random book where I write my thoughts. Like some sort of blog. I can write about the things that broke my heart, but also random things about the fandoms I'm in! Maybe a review too? Just let me know what you want me to talk about!
Updates are...
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Hi! I'm Miss Innocent! I wont be giving my real name, I hope you understand why. It's just because maybe someone I know is gonna read this and that would be awkward, trust me! ;)
So, from now on you can call me Lae. (Pronounced like 'bae' but with an 'L', duh!) I like that name, no offence. Again, it's not my real name. I'm not comfortable with giving my name to the world. Maybe some day!
The reason why I do this, is because I am suppressing my thoughts and my feelings. Every day, my vision of life gets worse. And it has to stop. I need to tell someone. Before writing this, I asked myself: 'Lae, why would you do that? Not wanting to tell your parents how you feel, but letting the world read it all?' Then I actually realised no one would read this.
Then, why am I still writing this shit? I just feel relieved. It is a relief to write this and knowing your friends won't know about it. I'm also writing this because I know my life is ruined. This gives me the hope to fix it.
Now, what is the cause of my broken heart?
People at school. They laughed at me for what I did, how I look, act... They are the fucking reason I'm almost dead! I didn't want to live anymore! They don't realise it, but the feeling is there. The PAIN is real!
What does fandom 1 have to do with this?
He helped me get through those days. He doesn't know though. Listening to his music, even looking at his pictures. He made me smile and he still does. Today, he also released his new album: Illuminate. I love it already!
And of course I'm talking about this goddamn fucking sexy as fuck hotness,
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Shawn Mendes!
Just admit it, you're overwhelmed right now! The #MendesArmy virus has reached your veins! Probably not.
But be honest, he's hot! I've been a fan since 2014 and I still don't regret it.
So, he pulled me out of that hell. He helped me forget about everything for a little while. He's the reason I'm still alive. Sadly, he'll never know! But I'm glad he's there. Even though he does not know I exist, I still love him. No matter what!
From Illuminate; No Promises, Like This, Bad Reputation and Hold On are my favourites. And the ending of Understand! Ugh! What is/are your favourite(s)?
That's actually all I had to say today.
Thank you for reading and stay tuned!
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