IT' SN OTOVE R [English]

• Something Wrong •

The crew and the staff gave us some minutes to finish the tests on the stage for the next day's concert.
Josh was checking the drums, verifying that there weren't any problems.
Sometimes he looked at me and I could hear soft laughs while I was running on the stage, jumping on the piano and singing like if the room was full of people.
I always do that before every event, so I know how much space I can use for the shows.
It helps me to get better into the music and it's very, very funny whit Josh by my side.

I stopped singing and I approached Josh, who threw me a bottle of water and sat on the stage's edge, the arms behind his back and the gaze on the ceiling.
The headphones were lying on the simple grey shirt and the black shorts allowed me to see the tattoo above the right knee.
Tyler.
My gaze went down on my tattoo, covered by the black jeans.
I should wear shorts more often.

I took off my headphones.

«Thanks man» I drank some water, sitting next to him and taking off the sweat on my forehead with the back of my hand.

I wasn't looking up like Josh, but straight in front of me.
I don't look up anymore.
If you look up you haven't got the full control of what's happening around you, and bad things could happen.
Bad things always happen.

Josh started talking, the gaze still on the ceiling and the pink hair in every direction.

«Have we finished for today? Or do you wanna rehearse something else?» a mild smile on his lips while he pronounced the second phrase.

They were sincere questions, he wasn't tired or bored and he didn't ask them because he wanted to go away and stop playing music for that day.

«Uhm, do you mind if we try Stressed Out? I'm still a little insecure with the hanging microphone» I said frowning a little.

«Yeah, no problem» he nodded and stood up stretching his arms.

Then he approached the drums walking fast and smiling.

I waited.
I stood up only when he started playing and I approached the microphone moving to the beat.
I looked at Josh playing, he was biting his lips and his eyes were closed.

And right at the moment I grabbed the microphone and started singing, my eyes closed too.

«I wish I found some better sounds no one's ever heard»

I opened my eyes looking at Josh, there was a little smile on his lips.
I couldn't help smiling too.

«I wish I had a better voice that sang some better words»

A feeling like anxiety was growing in my chest.

«I wish I had an other friend that I wouldn't hate»

I didn't know how it could be possible.
I wouldn't ever say something like that.
I wouldn't ever want someone instead of him.
I looked at him.
His eyes were opened and he seemed confused but also amused, was he thinking that it was a joke?

«I wish I didn't have to talk the first time we met»

There was something wrong.
But I kept singing, I couldn't stop.
I've lost control of my words.
I looked at Josh again.
The fear growing in my chest.
He understood that something was wrong, but he kept playing.

«Hey Tyler, what are you singing?»

«It's- it's not me, Josh»

I was afraid, and I bet he heard the fear in my voice too.

«I was told when I get older I would love my life»

My hands went to grab my head and my hair.
No. Stop it, stop it!
My chest seemed about to explode.
No, please.

«But now I wish I died the first time I tried»

I fell on my knees, my head still in my hands.
I heard Josh's drumsticks hitting the floor.
Oh no, not him.

«Josh!»

The room was dark, too dark.
There was only a red light coming from somewhere behind us.
I tried to approach the drums illuminated by that blood light.

Then the voice, behind us.
It was deep, cold, you could feel it in your bones.
The voice that had sounded too many times in my head.
I thought it was gone.
I thought he was gone.

«My name's Blurryface and I care what you think»