The Art of Being Played

Revenge

You know what I have discovered about life? The fact that if you don't want to be beaten down by it, you have to face it head on, and come back fighting when it gets you down.

That and the fact that a grape juice drinking contest in a school parking lot does not end as well as one would hope it would. But that story is for another time.

This story is about how I, Cassidy Jones, went from being played... To well, being played. Okay, I'm getting ahead of myself. It all started right after Carter left me. And I was handling it alright, I suppose...

"How could he leave me?"

Yeah, alright...

"I was so good to him!"

So everyone has their moments.

"What's the point of life anymore?"

Yeah, okay... So maybe I was a total wreck after Carter broke up with me. But I didn't stay that way for long. After weeks of doing nothing but cry and eat my depression away using cereal, I had finally had enough.

I was through needing someone to like me in order to feel that I was of any importance. I hated the fact that I found my self worth in others. So, by the time school rolled around and my summer spent binge watching Netflix in my bed came to an end, I was ready.

Or so I thought. But I also found out that things are much more easily thought then done.

~***~

I walked into the school doors of Wookbrick High School, the place I had already wasted two years of my life in. The halls still wreaked of desperation and freshman; two things that I had grown quite familiar with in the past two years. Striding to my locker with my best friend, Rowan, in tow, I mentally prepared myself for seeing him again.

Apparently, no amount of 'mentally preparing' helps for when you actually coming face-to-face with your problems.

"Oh my... There he is, there he is!" I panicked. My breath quickened just looking at him. "I can't do this," I started to turn on my heels when my conscience held me firm in my tracks.

In other words, Rowan yanked on my arm to stay put. I hadn't seen Carter in over two months and I thought I was ready to see him again. But looking at him within five feet of me made me quickly realize that I was, as mater of fact, not ready.

"You'll be fine," Rowan reasoned. "We've practiced seeing him again a million times in your room. You can do this."

"Practicing with you as him is a whole different story when he is actually him!" I retorted. She had to be kidding if she thought I could do this!

"Cass, look at me." She put her arms on my shoulders, confronting the pathetic excuse for a human I was. Her brown eyes had a calming way about them. Too bad all I could see was the memory of him leaving me in front of my eyes, playing on repeat.

As much as I didn't want to admit it, I wasn't over him. I thought I could be, that I could move on. But what do you do when you have someone that gives you happiness in this crazy thing called life, just disappears and takes all that happiness with them?

I, for one, certainly did not know. All I knew was that everything I once had had been taken away from me and left me feeling empty. Which was a weird feeling. I wasn't any less a whole without him, I was still me. But in a way, he took a piece of me with him, and I wanted the piece back!

"You are a strong, smart, beautiful girl. You do not need scum-bags like him. Men are good-for-nothing specimens of this earth and you certainly do not need one to make you feel happy!" She said that as if she could read my mind. And although I knew she was right, I couldn't come to face that fact.

Why did I still want to hold on to him? Why couldn't I just let him go? Was it because he made me smile? Because he made me laugh? Yes it had been those things, but it was also because of so much more.

I nodded in agreement. I wasn't sure if it was because I actually agreed or because I knew it would make her drop the subject faster. We continued walking down the hallway to our lockers and I kept my head down, not daring to look at him. As soon as I passed Carter, I let out a breath of relief. Maybe I could do this.

~***~

"You haven't even touched your food," Rowan pointed out. And she was right. All I had accomplished for the past ten minuets was transferring my food from one side of my plate to the other, creating a colorful representation of how I felt on the inside; one big pile of mush.

I didn't respond but only looked up at her. Seeming to know just by the expression on my face, she let out a sigh, "We need to get you out of this 'mood'. I thought I had snapped you out of whatever this is during the summer, but it only came back to haunt us." Rowan had an interesting way with expressions.

She herself, was an interesting person. She had softly curled brown hair, with the ends of it lightly dyed turquoise. Not to mention her style with her colorful clothing. From her pastel skirts to her plaid shirts, she was a character.

But don't make the mistake of taking her for a docile lady. She had a spark about her and it would come out in the best of ways... Or worse depending on which side you were on. That is why, I was always on the right side right next to her. That sweet, little facade she puts up turns deadly when crossed.

I used to have that spunk. That's where she got hers from. Back before I turned into the nothing I am now. Back before my life was ruined by that cantankerous, patronizing specimen that was mankind's greatest down fall. I stabbed my food. She was right, I did need to get out of this mood.

"Hello? Cassidy, are you even listening to me?" She inquired, raising an eyebrow. She always did that when she was angry or annoyed and someone dared to say something of question.

I let out a silent chuckle to myself. I taught her that. The irony, she's more of a me than I was.

She continued to stare impatiently. I looked up at her, "Oh, yeah. I just..." I trailed off, not really know what 'I just' was leading up to.

She let out another sigh, more audible this time. "I know just what you need." This made me look up at her. It was my turn to raise a questioning eyebrow.

"Revenge." That was all she needed to say. Because it was in that moment when something sparked inside of me, something devious, something dangerous, something treacherous went off inside my head.

Man, I missed this feeling. The feeling of a hazardous mindset, leaving everyone guessing what I would do next. It was like I had power again. Power over not only myself, but power that was about to take hold of someone else.

A smirk worked its way up to my mouth.
"What do you have in mind?"