the lights are always off

Ⅲ

"I missed you," Mikey would tell me in his five-year-old voice, his dark hair a mess. God, I miss that.

"I love you too," I say as I rub over the cover of the book. "Thank you."

My door clicks shut as he leaves my room and his pain washes over me.

-

Ryan giggles softly as I push him off my lap, a short laugh bubbling out of my mouth too. Suddenly Ryan's weight is on both sides of me, his knees pinning me down to the bed.

"You can't just expect me to not be all over you," Ryan says, shocking me with how close he is as his breath fans over my jaw and neck. His voice is quiet and seductive when he says, "Do you know how hard that would be?"

I smile and turn my head away, but Ryan kisses my cheek anyway. "I bet it would be so hard, but it'd be possible."

"I doubt it," Ryan mumbles, his lips suddenly against my neck. I instinctively tilt my head. "I wish you could see how gorgeous you are."

"Shut up," I sigh, closing my eyes. I expect Ry to go further and slip his hands up my shirt, but he doesn't. He knows his limits well. Still, his touch seems to be everywhere and it's nice. It's all so fucking nice.

"I can't," Ryan mumbles and presses a quick kiss to my lips. His fingers slide between mine and I smile as I lean forward for another kiss.

I don't think I've ever been this attached to someone.

After a while of lounging around and kissing, Ryan decides it's time for lunch. He isn't a very good cook, truthfully, but he can make a kickass grilled cheese.

"I don't think we've got any cheese," I say, remembering yesterday when Mikey announced he'd used the last of it in an omelet. I lean against the counter as Ryan searches for food. "Are there any chips in the cabinet?"

"No, but I got Cheez Whiz," Ryan deadpans, and there's the telltale clink of the metal can against the counter next to me.

"Can you even make a sandwich with that shit?" I ask, wrinkling my nose.

"I'll figure something out. You eat some crackers," Ryan says with a chuckle, sliding a package of thins into my hands. My lips curl into a smirk and I toss the crackers in Ryan's general direction.

"I don't want crackers!" I whine playfully as the package hits the hardwood floor. "Make me something edible!"

Ryan eventually half-ass warms some canned chicken noodle soup, which is much better than crackers, and sits me down at the table with the bowl.

He sits next to me, his hand resting on my thigh under the table, a habit of his. I don't mind at all.

-

I guess Frank slipped my mind, because when the doorbell rings, I nearly jump out of my skin.

"Who...?" Ryan mumbles, his shoes clicking against the floor on the way to get the door.

I shrug, "I have no idea."

I hear Ryan flip the locks and open the door, obviously confused as to who the boy at the door is. I break out into a grin when I hear Frank's voice saying something that sounds a lot like, "No, we met yesterday, I helped him get home."