Skulduggery Pleasant Spoof: The Holiday

Chapter Four: The Beach

Skulduggery went quiet. “You bruised my ego.”

“Do I look like I care?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well for future reference this is my not caring face.”

She put her sunglasses on and, bag on arm walked out of the hotel making all passers-by stop and stare.

Valkyrie and Tanith, sunglasses already on, caught up with China and the three girls started to jabber.

Skulduggery and Ghastly exchanged confused looks; Fletcher was gawking at China, (Poor Fletcher, still under China’s spell,) and followed the girls down to the beach which was right next to the hotel.

The beach was completely covered with people and all the good spots were taken but that was taken care of by an unusual amount of sand being blown until some people left.

Skulduggery and Ghastly set up everything while the girls ran as fast as they could to the water except for China who lied down in the sun to tan.

Skulduggery settled down to read a book and Ghastly took a nap. No one knew where Fletcher went.

“Wheeeeee!” Valkyrie cheered as she and Tanith raced as fast as they could down to the water. Valkyrie had currently taken the lead after Tanith had tripped on some random fat guy who was as red as a tomato.

Valkyrie skidded to a halt next to the water’s edge and peered into the clear water.

Suddenly something slammed into her from behind and she went flying to the ice cold water.

She shrieked as she slammed into the water, drenching herself.

Valkyrie wheeled around and saw Tanith kneeling in the water. They looked at each other and burst out laughing.

They continued to splash each other and chase each other through the waves. Suddenly Valkyrie got an idea. “Let’s go surfing!” She squealed.

“Yeah!”

They ran off and soon came back with two surf boards from the Surf Shop.

Valkyrie’s was bright yellow and green striped board. Tanith’s was red and white.

They ran past Skulduggery squealing loudly. He looked up. “Be careful!” He called.

“We know!” Tanith yelled back. “We aren’t going to get our necks broken!”

“That’s not what I’m worried about! You could get a splinter if you’re not careful!”

Valkyrie laughed. “He is SO over protective.”

“Yeah,” Tanith agreed.

Five Minutes Later….

“Ow! Splinter!” Valkyrie yelped.

“Told you.”

Skulduggery laughed then looked down at China who lay on her stomach next to him, sunbathing. “Why aren’t you out having fun?”

China looked up. “I want to get a good tan first, you can’t exactly get a good tan in Ireland.”

Skulduggery nodded.

Suddenly China looked off toward the shore. “Fletcher that fish don’t want to play.”

Skulduggery looked over and saw Fletcher throwing a fish around saying “fly!”

Skulduggery sighed and shook his head then flicked his hand and a gust of wind threw the fish out of the air and twenty- yards into the ocean.

China went back to sun-bathing and Skulduggery back to his reading.

Ghastly grinned as he waded through the water. He could see Valkyrie standing waist deep in the water pulling the splinter from her surf board out of her finger.

‘The perfect moment.’

Before Valkyrie looked up Ghastly created a huge wave of water and aimed it at Valkyrie.

Valkyrie scowled and winced as she pulled the splinter out of her finger. She looked up and saw the ten-foot wall of water coming towards her.

Her eyes widened and before she could do anything the water smashed into her, throwing her off her feet.

Valkyrie squealed and began thrashing around in the waves. She looked up and saw Tanith laughing her head off.

She glared but knew that Tanith couldn’t have thrown that wave at her since she wasn’t an elemental. Valkyrie turned her head and saw Ghastly snickering.

Her eyes narrowed and then she grinned. She moved her hand through the water, concentrating and then when she was sure that she had the swirling motion down, released the mound of swirling water.

Ghastly looked up, saw the water hurtling toward him but could do nothing about it slamming into his face.

He flew backward and landed with a loud SPLASH!!!!!!

Valkyrie laughed then looked up, stopped laughing, and dove out of the way to avoid the wave Ghastly sent her way.

Soon China had rolled over onto back and looked over only to see Fletcher climbing an empty guard tower.

“I CAN FLY!!!!!!!” he squealed.

“Fletcher, only Skulduggery and birds that aren’t ostriches or penguins can fly.”

Fletcher jumped and fell on the ground face first.

China just sighed and put her sunglasses on.

They hung out at the beach all day, only leaving to grab some snow cones which they vowed never to get again after Tanith got too hyper and ran around the beach for two hours straight. ‘I guess that’s what happens when you eat thirteen snow cones in a row.’

Finally at about five they all headed back into the hotel and got ready for bed. Since Tanith had slept in the bed the night before Valkyrie decided that China got to sleep in it tonight.

China had smiled smugly and crawled in next to Valkyrie while Tanith fumed and complained about how pruny she was after spending over five hours in the ocean and how she was going to get all wet because there was still water in the tub from when they took their showers so Valkyrie told her to go find somewhere else to sleep.

After a few minutes of trying to find a suitable sleeping place Tanith finally got an idea.

She grabbed her teddy bear and walked across the hall to the boys room. After successfully infiltrating their headquarters by using magic, Tanith walked past Ghastly, who was snoring  quietly, Fletcher, who was wearing blue footie pajamas with teddy bears on them, over to Skulduggery, who lay on top of the bed meditating.

Tanith though, so tired that she didn’t notice Skulduggery in the bed, crawled in next to him and fell asleep.