Every Other Day

Shoot From the Heart

Have you ever wanted to not wake up
Just lie in bed every minute, every hour, every day...
What is the point in waking up to a Tuesday's morning or even a Wednesday.
Lying in bed was the only thing I wanted to do.
Getting up and getting dressed, combing my hair, brushing my teeth.
Doing my usual morning routine,
Sighing. "What's the point? The point in life exactly?" I say looking in the bathroom mirror. I turn my head to the left and see a photo. It's the same photo I look at every morning. It gives me the courage to actually go to school but what does anymore. Going to school, is like going to prison.

I grab my leather jacket and put it on, to cover the scars on my wrist that words have caused. "Like I said what's the use, the use of going to school?
All it has is people who hate and despise you."

Grabbing my backpack that was on my chair, the nail on the chair grabbed a hold of my backpack and tears it wide open, having everything scattered on the floor.

"Kelsey!" My mother calls.
I know when my mother calls it means the bus is here. I hurry and grab my stuff and rush out the front door to the bus.

Sitting in the very back, I grab my ear buds and stick them in my ears to ignore the rest of the world and even my inner thoughts...

The thoughts I have are so loud not even music can keep them away.
"Your scars mean your weak..."
Says my inner thoughts.
Repeating themselves over and over.
"You don't know me, leave me along!"
I say to the thoughts yet they are still attacking me with rejection.
"Shut up dammit!"
Every turns around and looks at me.
I just realized I said it out loud.
Getting embarrassed I cover my face with my hands and hoping it will go away and wishing it wasn't real.

The bus comes to a complete stop and I hurry off it and to the school and to first hour.