The Angel that Stole My Heart

The Angel Who Abandoned Me

I once loved someone. Someone who I could cry around and depend on to make me laugh. I loved her with all my heart. Whenever I looked at her, I couldn't look away from her beauty. Her smile was contagious and could cure the entire world of sadness. But then that day came. July 17th. The day all of that ended. The day her smile stopped working.

She called me on the phone. I could hear the sadness in her voice and hear the tears rolling down her face. She muttered those five words that could destroy the galaxy. "I want to break up" she said. I couldn't do anything. In that moment, I believe I truly died. I couldn't do anything. I was rendered completely speechless. I just held in my tears and tried to act calm, but anyone in the room could see the expression on my face. I was screaming internally. I always thought she was an angel and couldn't hurt a fly, but of course I was wrong. She could've killed an entire country the way she dropped that bomb on me.

At the end of the call, I managed to act brave and put on a smile you could hear through the phone saying "it's okay, I understand" but of course I didn't. Who could understand what just happened when you thought you were in something so perfect it could never end. That day I learned nothing is perfect especially relationships.

A few days passed and I felt I finally got over her. That was when it hit me. All the feelings, the regret, the memories, everything came rushing back when my friends brought me a pineapple smoothie, our favourite drink. I broke down and bawled my eyes out in the middle of the food court.

I was angry at myself. How could I let this happen? I should've fought for her. What happened to ruin our perfect lives? The questions drowned me in an ocean of regret and curiosity. I turned on some music and put on a fake smile. You could see the internal struggle from a simple glance. I never got over her. She was everything I loved. She was everything I wanted. She was everything that I would ever need. I tried getting a new person to bring meaning to my life, but I would constantly be woken up in the middle of the night crying because she was truly gone. She had no place in my life anymore and left an empty hole where my heart used to be. That empty hole grew bigger and bigger with every failed relationship. I missed her.

There was no way to ever recover. She took my heart and will never give it back. I want her back.

I want her back.

I need her back.

Months later, I hadn't changed a bit. I was still waiting for her to come back into my life. But I made a decision finally. I wasn't going to let this bring me down anymore. It would all be over with one click. It only took a second. The pain of the bullet penetrating my skull was nothing compared to the pain she caused me.