South Park One Shots

Don't be silly~! (FakeVampire!Butters x Helpful!reader)

   You watched "Vampire" Butters walk down the hall. He thought he was a vampire for some stupid reason. You didn't really care, it's just that you missed the old Butters. The one you fell in love with. Now he acted cold to everybody. Even you! And you both are best friends. You knew he wasn't a real vampire. It was because of those "vampire" kids. What was so special about vampires anyway? You continued walking down the hall to talk to the "vampire" kids and their leader, but when you got there, the leader wasn't there, just the other "vamps".

"Where is your leader?" "We don't know." "Well I need you to make Butters stop believing he's a vampire." "Yeah, um, we can't do that." "Oh and why not?" "We tried to get him to leave but he won't. He says he won't bug us but that he can't help that he's a vampire." "You told him he wasn't, right?" "Of course! He just won't believe us!" "Oh. Do you know where he is?" "He's probably in the music room. No one's using it and it's really dark. You better fix that kid." "I will." "Do you even know how?" "Of course, we are friends after all." "Even after the way he treated you and everybody?" "Once a friend, always a friend." After that, you walked off to the music room.

'Where is that stupid music room? Wait... There it is!!!' You slowly open the door and you briefly see Butters run deeper into the room. "Butters?" "(Y/n)...What are you doing here?" "I wanted to talk to you, can you come out so we can talk?" "Sure, whatever. Just close the door." There he goes, being cold. You close the door and Butters runs up to you. "Well? What were you going to say?" "*Sigh* Butters... You aren't really a vampire." "(Y/n) I am a vampire and there's nothing you can do about it. We vampires are cold and secretive. If you can't handle that than what kind of friend are you?" 'Thats it.. I can't take it anymore!' Thats when you snapped. "Goddammit Butters!! What kind of friend am I?!?!?! What kind of friend are you?!?!?! I HAVE BEEN WAITING,HELPING,TALKING TO YOU, AND SUPPORTING YOU AND YOU ASK WHAT KIND OF FRIEND I AM?! I'LL TELL YOU WHAT KIND OF FRIEND I AM!! I AM A FRIEND WHO CARES DEEPLY FOR HER OTHER FRIENDS, AND ALWAYS TRIES TO UNDERSTAND AND SUPPORT THEM!! WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU?!?! HUH?! NO! YOU KNOW WHAT?! I'LL ANSWER THAT QUESTION FOR YOU!! YOU ARE THE FRIEND THAT IF A NEW FAD COMES, WILL ABANDON THEIR OWN FRIEND WHO HAS STUCKEN BY THEM THROUGH THE TOUGH. YOU ARE THE KIND OF FRIEND WHO WILL ACT COLD TO THEIR FRIEND EVEN WHEN THEY TRY TO HELP THEM!!"

After your outburst, Butters looked surprised. "Why-why do you hate me?" All you had to do was hear his voice crack to drive you over the edge. "NO!! THAT'S NOT FAIR!! YOU CAN'T ACT LIKE YOU DID NOTHING AND THEN BLAME IT ON ME TO MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY!! NO!! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH JUST TO HELP YOU AND THEN YOU SAY I HATE YOU?! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?! IF I HATED YOU WOULD I HAVE STUCK BY YOUR SIDE? NO! IF I HATED YOU, WOULD I HAVE HELPED YOU? NO! YOU HAVE NO IDEA OF HOW I FEEL!! I HAVE LOVED YOU SINCE THE DAY WE BECAME BEST FRIENDS AND YOU START ACTING COLD TO ME!? DO YOU KNOW HOW I FELT? DO YOU KNOW HOW I STILL FEEL? NO! I DOUBT YOU EVEN CARE!! Even though we've been friends for so long.. you don't even care.." You collapsed on the ground crying. Suddenly you were over-whelmed in warmth.

'Huh?' "(Y/n).." "Butters.. look I know you don't want to believe me..but...even the "vamps" said you weren't a vampire. They were fooling you." "Oh.. Thank you for telling me (Y/n). I wish I would have listened. But before you interrupted me, I wanted to tell you, I love you." You swear your heart stopped. "I don't care if I get grounded, I'm just happy I have you as a girlfriend." You smiled and pulled Butters in for a kiss. When you pulled away you were smirking which left Butters confused. "Why are you smirking?" You flashed him a toothy grin when he realized it. You had fangs and his were gone. "(Y/n)..Are you a vampire?" *Facepalm* "No Butters I took yours out." "Oh! OK then." He smiled at you then you both fell asleep in the music room.