Lost Innocence

July 4, 1992

I've never been one to ask for much in life. Only things I knew I was meant to have. Among all those things were going to school, being happy, and maybe later having a family. The only problem was that I only achieved part of those things. I was genuinely happy. I got to graduate high school and was planning on going to an out-of-state University. Fourth of July is always meant to be a time of joy in my household; a time to celebrate as a family.

It was summer of 1992, and I had just graduated Cumberland High School down in Providence Rhode Island. I was looking forward to hitting the Big Apple. My desire to achieve a Bachelor of Science Degree attracted me to St. John's University. So far everything was going perfect. I received my letter of acceptance in April and was expected to show up for a tour in a few weeks. My parents were a little melancholy when I told them; we are a very close knit family, being that I am an only child. So this would be our last Fourth of July as a family before college which prompted the idea in their mind of making it the best one yet.

It was a cool evening. There was a full moon and the sky was flooded with stars; something I would miss once I got to New York; full of lights and huge skyscrapers. The beach was pretty close to where we were staying that summer. All we had to do was walk a few blocks and then cross abridge. We left the house around 11:40, We were hoping on meeting up with my parents' co-workers at the little ice cream shop in front of the beach that was always opened late during the summer.

I had never met them but they sounded nice from what they had been telling me. Apparently he and my father were childhood friends. The man's name is Daniel Gutierrez; he was the gardener for the Patterson family. Daniel had a son my parents were dying for me to meet. His name was Joshua; he was a few years older than me; already in his third year of college, studying to become a doctor.

Daniel has been working in that mansion for a really long time. He was the one that suggested my parents work there after they parents lost their job at an old school house here in Cumberland after it closed down. The mansion was located over at Smithfield.

My mother was beyond beautiful. She had long straight blond hair, pale skin, high cheek bones, rosy red lips, and big green eyes that sparkled when she laughed. Today her hair was curled and she had eyeliner on to make them pop. Her lips were redder thanks to some lipstick which I found unnecessary. She wore a pretty red dress that accentuated her figure which was lean.

My father was a handsome man with curly light brown hair, olive skin, broad shoulders, and a very athletic body. He had worked as a handyman at the mansion. Today he wore his Sunday best with a blood-red tie and white handkerchief in his left breast pocket. I for one was a mix of my mother and father. I have dirty blond hair, hazel eyes, high cheek bones, luscious curls, long lashes, and an athletic body. I wore a strapless white dress accompanied by a blood-red belt on my waist, my hair was down, and I had a little bit of makeup on.

We were only two blocks away from the beach and were chatting happily about future plans; We were so engrossed with the conversation we didn't notice the three men stumbling out of a pub; the three men that would change the course of our lives forever. We were walking by an alley when I was pulled away from my family. I heard my parents' screams as well as their footsteps.

The ally was dark and had the stench of rotten garbage. The only light was the glow of the full moon. I was pushed against the brick wall roughly. "Hey baby, you're looking mighty fine in that white dress of yours," his deep voice gave me Goosebumps. He moved his face closer to mine; his disgusting alcohol spiked breath hitting my face. "I bet you look even better with it off," he whispered.

At that he pulled down my dress violently; my chest exposed to the cool night breeze. He was like a hungry animal. Kissing every inch of me that was exposed. His hands went to the bottom of my dress. I kneed him and finally got a reaction. He fell to the ground a hand between his legs. Another man ran over to me raising his arm. I shut my eyes tightly and felt a sharp pain on my cheek knowing then on he had slapped me. Tears filled my eyes making my vision blur. Damn it he hit hard. I heard fighting in the background but what I distinguished the most was the noise of the man taking off his belt. I would be raped tonight....

I began kicking and punching but wasn't strong enough because he pushed me to the wall again this time harder than before. "Stop fussing bitch, you know you aren't strong enough. You know I'm fucking you whether you want it or not," he whispered in my ear. He punched me on the stomach and I slid to the floor out of breath. The fighting was closer and out of nowhere a voice I always recognize shrieked, "Get the fuck away from her you disgusting pig!" he sounded closer yet far away. Punches landed but they weren't at the prick now on top of me.

He ripped off my panties and threw them aside. As suddenly as it was about to begin he was pulled away from me. I got up tripping on my feet. The slight smell of blood tinted the night air. I stood up again shaking. My father was fighting with the one that was on top of me slugging him on the face repeatedly. Out of nowhere the man pulled out a .45 and shot my father on the chest repeatedly. My father fell to the ground and swiftly the gun was aimed to his temple. From the other wall there was a struggle taking place. My mother was fighting a fight impossible to win. A man held e against the wall and the other worked on opening he r legs and taking her panties off. It was a difficult task for them with all her kicking and squirming but they succeeded. Everything was happening so fast.

I tried running over to my mother but tripped once again. The man holding the gun to my father's head laughed evilly. "Any last words?" he said. My father looked at me and then my mother with tears filling his eyes. Then with pain in his voice he spoke, "I love you guys." With that the man pulled the trigger spilling his brains on the pavement. "No!!"I yelled. Suddenly feeling energy surge through me, I jumped at the man but he was standing strong not budging. One of the other men took out a knife stabbing me on the back. The pain was excruciating but I needed to save my mother.

Light-headed and weak I got up going towards the wall next to where my mother now lay; two men holding her down. A third dropping his pants exposing a skull tattoo on his left calve. I could not bear to see that, I ran over to him bumping his head on the brick wall. This only infuriated him more. He punched me on the jaw so hard I knew it was broken. The adrenaline from my body was gone.

My eyes closed and I waited for the shot that would end my life but it never came. I heard fighting again. I opened my eyes and my mother was free from the men and was running towards me. A shot fired and my mother was on the ground once again. One of the men dragged her away by her hair, "Get over here you stupid cunt!" He places her next to my father. Then another shot echoed. This time aimed at her head.

I was frozen there just staring at the scene in front of me. The man with the gun held me down. I no longer felt pain, I was numb; wishing all this was just a nightmare. He raped me and so did one of the others. The smell of blood was everywhere now. The only noise I heard was that of fireworks. It was midnight already...Blue, green, and white lights flooded the sky; hiding the once beautiful stars and filling the area up with heavy clouds of smoke. "Hey!! What are you three doing there?" The weight that pinned me down was lifted as they stumbled out of the ally. "Mom? Dad?" I whispered; my voice sounded like a five year-old. Tears rolling down my cheeks, I slowly got up walking to where both of their bodies lay.

Half their face was missing. My mothers once beautiful red dress was splattered with dark stains; blood, her blood. Her panties were to her ankles, the part of her face that wasn't destroyed was swollen. My father was a bloody corpse. I screamed at the top of my lungs. They tried trying to save me... The shrieking of the sirens replaced the popping of the fireworks. I fell to my knees seeing life crumble right in front of me, darkness finally filling my sight.