Project Death

Chapter 1 : London Bridge

"Honey, make a wish!" I look up at my mom's smiling face. I glance down at my chocolate cake which has a candle which is shaped as 8. I'm 8 years now.

I close my eyes and wished for all the things that I always wanted.

I wished to have that pink comb that I saw in the Joe's store last Sunday.

I wished for a dog.

I wished for a great new year.

I open my eyes, and all I can see is darkness. The darkness that is always there with me, something that calms me down these days.

It was easier back then, when only my mom's smiling face could make me happy. I could eat her apple pie all day without any worries.

But what happened?

Why did everything changed and turn out to be so different?

Why all the happiness is taken away from me?

These questions will always remain unanswered and I can feel the darkness inside me overpowering the little light inside.

I look outside at nothing, look at the place that remains me of the emptiness I feel inside. Can the feeling ever leave me?

Or am I always going to be in this dreaded place for the rest of my life, feeling like this?

I ask unanswerable questions to myself and always end up feeling glum.

I stand up confidently, knowing that the step that I've decided to take is the best for me, taking in the situation that I'm in.

From now on, no more worries, no more thinking about my family. Everyone will be happy from now on.

I walk out from my apartment still wearing my night clothes, a pajama and a top. I walk out from my building, not much people are here on the street, maybe because it's too late and they have a reason to stay inside.

I walk straight to the one place that always fascinates me.

The London Bridge.

It isn't that far from where I stay thankfully. I walk on the bridge, just saw a few vehicle passing me, that's it. No more people.

I still remember when I came to London 6 years ago. This place was my miracle, something that I wanted so badly and I knew it could change me for better.

And look, here I am, in the same place on the last day on this earth. I don't even want to think what'll happen next, because I'm sure whatever that will be, will surely be better than this.

I stand in the middle of the bridge, looking out at the beautiful city which has no meaning to me. This place really changed my life, in the opposite way.

The city which once I adored is now the city which is making me to take away my life.

I stand up on the thick railing holding the thick bar and look down. It's too deep, but should it matter?

I can see the reflection of light on the water and smile, my last picture isn't going to be that bad.

And I close my eyes...

"Oh my god, you must be so happy today!" She said smiling.

"Of course." I jumped on my bed.

"Stop it, Taylor. You'll hurt yourself."

"I'm sorry I can't. I'm really happy!" I laughed as she tries to control me, but I am not going to stop.

"Taylor. Please, stop."

"No No No – OUCH!" I fell down from the bed with a loud thud.

"My butt hurts." I said.

"Told you."

"Oh no." I close my eyes as the pain is not what I was expecting. How can someone feel so much pain from just falling off a bed?

I open my eyes and my hold on the bar tightens as I could feel an invisible jerk from my thoughts.

That was the last time I was happy, what happened after is what changed everything.

"Has anyone ever told you to wear nice clothes when you're about to die?"

My head turn towards the voice. I look at the shadow of a British man, who is walking towards me.

"Has anyone ever told you not to speak to a stranger?" I answered.

Now, I can see him in the light. The first think that I noticed is his boots, they actually look good and slowly my view moves up. His dark jeans and dark t-shirt really appeals me. I can't properly see his face but why is he here so late?

"Why are you here so late?" I asked.

"Why are you talking to a stranger?" He raises an eyebrow.

"Leave." I roll my eyes and divert my attention down at the sea.

"Close your eyes and imagine that you're a pop star, a singing sensation and this is your concert. Fans are everywhere, they are shouting and cheering and loving your performance. You look down at them and can see their happy faces. And you think of something that a lot of pop stars do. You jump on the crowd."

I open my eyes and look at him in confusion.

"What are you doing?"

"Well, that was your cue to jump."

"Oh." I just realized what he wanted to do.

"Oh." He imitates me.

"Why are you helping me again?" I asked.

"I don't know." He stands on the railing, holding one of the bars just like me. "You seem like a lovely lady and my mum taught me to help lovely ladies."

"Even when the lovely lady is going to jump from the bridge?"

"There were no terms and conditions." He smiles and looks at the view.

"Are you scared to do it?" He asked.

"No."

"Good."

"Why are you here?" I ask again, hoping he'll answer me. I didn't want to die not knowing what this guy is doing.

"I'm here for the same thing."

My eyes widen. Is he serious?

"What do you mean?"

"Oh silly American girl, I'm here to jump from this bridge."

"Is this your assignment or something?" I asked.

"No, I'm here to free myself from this world." He smiles.

"So, you're really going to jump?" I asked.

"Was I not clear the first time? Come on, let's do it fast." He claps. "You go first."

"Me?"

"Yeah, or do you want to do it together?"

"This is weird. I don't want to do it with a stranger."

"Do it with a stranger? We're not going to have sex. It doesn't matter. Come on close your eyes, we should finish it as fast as possible."

"I- okay. Let's do it." It's now or never.

I take one deep breath and unwrap my hand from the bar.

"Let's count together." I hear him say. He holds my hand, which feels queer in a good way. Why am I thinking like this here? My stomach feels weird. I should have eaten something. Wait, what the hell am I thinking?

"3...2....1."

A/N

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