Haunted Past

Chapter 2: Drunken Reunion

Its been about two weeks since the funeral, and I've been trying to just forget it all. Though it seems since that day, my flashbacks have gotten so vivid I could swear they were happening all over again. I could feel my father's cold touch and hear his drunk slurs as he ripped my innocence away from me. Each touch tearing me in half until the pieces were unrecognizable. With each and every night the pieces blew further and further away.

It took me so long to at least bring those pieces back together, but now I was afraid a gust was going to come again.

*Ring! Ring! Ring!* my phone suddenly going off waking me

Looking down at the caller ID I could see an unknown number flashing back at me... who is this calling me and why so early in the morning. Reluctantly I picked up.

"Hello", I said half asleep but calmly.

"Faith", the voice said.

"Faith its your mom"

Hearing those words alone woke me up. Two weeks ago at the funeral was the first time we talked in 5 years, but how did she get my number now, I wouldn't give it to her of all people. I barely had the chance to say a word when we talked, if you consider that talking.

I could've easily hung up. I could've hung up and never looked back with just the press of a button. Instead I listened, I don't know why it was against everything I've learned but I kept listening.

" We need to talk " she says hesitantly

If I say I wasn't surprised when she say that, then I would be lying. Why now after 5 years does she want to talk? I ponder

" About what? " I say firmly no trying to show my true fear

" Not on the phone, come over " she says and like that she was gone, and I was now alone again

For awhile I just sat there not knowing what to say or do, though the exact length of time I couldn't even guess. I probably contemplated about if I should go or not a thousand times before I actually decided to go. In all honesty I was scared.....

I cleared my mind on drive down the rode to the place I dreaded going to for years, my hands were shaking. I was going to the place I swore I wouldn't go back, the same place that was once my home and my prison.

I arrived, turning into a sharp curved driveway of my old home, I started regretting coming. I just sat in the car for a while trying to muster the courage to walk up those steps. I felt my entire body beginning to tremble. Why am I still so scared of you this place, mom, and my memories. Why am I still scared of you dad.... even though you're gone.

Wanting this to finally end I walking out the car and a surge of memories hit me. I remembered exactly how this house was, it seems every detail was etched into my mind. Now there was a clean driveway with a deep front porch and green shutters, but had long ago darkened to the color of the slate-gray yard around it. Rain-rotted shingles drooped over the eaves of the porch with oak trees tall enough to eclipse the sun. The remains of a picket fence barely guarded the front yard - a yard that seems as if hasn't been cut in weeks. Where the walkway once laid, had now become a nest for weeds inching there way through the concrete.

Coming up to the door I could smell the stench of cigarette smoke and liquor in the air. This... the final moment... maybe its not too late, to just turn around and just drive away. I kept thinking. Ok.. her I go... her I go... her I go, I say trying to psych myself up

*Knock! Knock!* I wait but there's no response, so I try again.

*Knock! Knock!* No response again.

"Maybe I should go, doesn't seem as if anyone's home."

To be honest I was a little relieved no one answered, but I had to know why she called after all this time.. why now? If no ones home maybe I should just leave.

"Ughh..." a drunken moan coming from someone inside

Its seems someone was home; I decided I wouldn't turn around and leave. This was something I had to do, I just needed to know... I needed answers.

As the door slide open it let out an agonizing creek. Now the stench of cigarette smoke and liquor seemed to envelope the air. From across the room I could see her just sitting there on the couch. I could see the empty beer bottles and full ash trays that seemed to cover the dining room table. The smoke from the freshly smoked cigarettes was slowly seeping into the air, leaving the house slightly foggy.

It didn't seem like she was going to answer the door, she just sat there obviously drunk and oblivious to my presence. Finally I spoke.

"Mom", I said hesitantly

" Ohh its yu, wah do yu want?", she said hiccupping after each word.

" You called earlier asking me to come over, remember? " I replied. Though she just looked at me with a confused expression, as if I was speaking another language.

" Ohh ya, shit I forgot " she replied, still with the same bewildered look smeared across her face. I could tell the meeting held no importance to her now.

Just standing in this house.... all the things that I once left behind years ago were now overwhelming me. I could feel my chest tighten and my eyes being overcome by my tears. This was a mistake coming here... a big mistake

" I'll just go " I said, trying to hide the cracking in my voice

"Nooo stay drink with mommy let's talk bout the ol'days" she said in a mixture of spit and beer residue.

Drunk, completely drunk. Why had I thought she'd call me over for a good reason. The way she spoke on the phone gave me the idea she was sorry, but I knew her better than that. I've been with her for 18 years and she's never shone any sign of changing.

"I'm leaving mom, please don't call me again", I said with a little more courage in my voice.

"Ohh yu think yu too gud for me! .. Get out!.. luhh Ms. Fancy..." she replied, in her drunken rambling.

She dropped her head back, suddenly too tired to care if I stayed or leave.

" just go...I don't need yu...I don't need anyone!" she said, taking another gulp of her Heineken bottle

How could I have been so foolish, to think that now she would want to be my mom. I decided to just leave, I refuse to give her the satisfaction of letting her see me cry.