The Affectionate Player - Part2

Chapter 12

His eyes are filled with such desperation but not for himself. It's for me and our children. It's for our future. His words hit home causing me to recall my earlier thoughts, permitting me a moment of clarity to relieve myself of my own anxieties. We're in this together and right now, he looks so alone. Placing my hand on his cheek he turns his lips to my palm and kisses it.

"I'll see her. I promise. I want all of us safe, too, Max."

"Thank you, love," he whispers, and as he closes his eyes relief washes over him, his shoulders dropping instantly.

"What if she hates me? Or worse, Max. What if she loves me?" Pulling me to his chest he comforts me with the sound of his beating heart and the scent of his beautiful skin.

"I'm scared," I whisper.

"I know you are, beautiful. But it's all going to be okay. No matter what happens."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because we love each other," he murmurs, nuzzling the top of my head. "And I'll kiss you all better until the pain goes away."

"I love you, baby."

"I love you, too," he sighs. "Remember this morning when I introduced you to the laundry room?" I sense his grin and instantly I smile recalling our rendezvous.

"Where are you going with this?"

"That's who we are, Gracie. We're lovers and when we love each other we're one. We face this as one. All the way. Do you understand?"

"Yes." His sentiment is so sincere I almost sob.

"Good. So tomorrow, what's the plan?"

                                                            ***************

I've no idea how he does it but somehow Max makes me fall more in love with him every single day. Yesterday had been totally unexpected with events taking a U-turn. I'd gone to see Father Hughes with the idea that I'd have one conversation to fact-find, then I'd leave and switch off storing the information in a box in my head ready to use when needed. Why I'd been so naïve I'll never know. Maybe my methodical thinking has something to do with my work. First appointment for information, second appointment to close. Of course, life isn't like that at all and sometimes the more information you have available, the less you like what you learn.

I'd been a bag of nerves by the end of the day but with Max's understanding and honest conversation he'd helped me remember why I'm here; to gain information about Geri that may in time protect us all and potentially bring Jonny King out of hiding. That's the most important outcome from all of this and as Holly and Monty's parents it's our responsibility to ensure that happens. And while I'm frightened for myself of all I'll come to know, what I'm learning is that with Max by my side I feel supported and a little more courageous each day.

That's why we've come again this morning to speak with Father Paul who has kindly agreed to see me at short notice. Greeting us, he escorts us to his study where he places an envelope on the coffee table.

"I'm pleased you decided to come back, Gracie, and I apologise for shocking you yesterday. Clearly you hadn't realised that your mother is still alive."

"I hadn't, Father. Thank you for seeing us again. I have a couple of questions I hope you might know the answer to."

"Of course. Make yourself comfortable." He guides me to the sofa where I join Max who's already seated. I'm so nervous I'm certain it shows.

"Thanks. Right. I'm ready."

"Then fire away."

"OK. Forgive me if I'm wrong, Father, but yesterday you implied that Paddy just left Willow to fend for herself after the twins died."