It's been months, too many months. I've worked hard to maintain myself and keep going but without anyone I haven't been able to. Trying to not think about you was the hardest of all, but I finally worked through it. I worked hard and got passed it, this tough period. And now I'm ready to start anew, to find You, the one I'm meant for. This next period in my life will not be one without challenge, as many experiences before have told me. But finding myself will make this one easier, allow me to build a strong connection with someone and finally answer when asked who I am.
You will be the one I've been looking for, the one I've been waiting for. You will be the one to let me settle in and become real and normal, to become who I was meant to be and who I've dreamed to become. You will be who I will build up unwittingly, help back to their feet, and you will not need to call out. Finding you is a goal, but the search will be far easier than the hold. I will know when I have found you and know who you are when you come, but keeping you will be the hardest part, maintaining a relationship, a friendship. For true joy does not come easy, true joy does not bring itself onto you, true joy is a challenge many people will face but not all will succeed at. You will be that true joy, true love. I will work and struggle for you, destroy myself only for you to build me back up again.
