Begin Again - Dramione

Late Nights

She heaved a deep breathe, her shoulders sagging, as she looked away. I could see her struggling to compose herself. "Don't let her get under your skin, you know better than that." I whispered to her.

I raised her hand up and gave her knuckles a soft kiss. I heard her sniffle and looked up to see her eyes brimming with tears. I felt a slight pang of anger in my chest, realizing just how deeply hurt she was.

"I– I know.. I have been trying so hard, to not think about what she said, but I just– I don't know anymore.." She whispered, crying freely.  "If only I hadn't acted so recklessly and had I not asked you to split up before going into the forest, Pansy could've had been saved.. I- I let her d-die.. Right in front of me.."

I didn't know what to say as she vented, so instead I pulled her close to my side, letting her bury her face in my chest as she cried.

"I- I had noticed Ron's odd behavior ever since we returned to school, but I always shrugged it off as his many mood swings.. If only I had bothered to ask him what was going on.. That day of the ball.. He had been so off.." She mumbled against my chest.

I waited for her to calm down before pulling her away gently. I took her face in my hands, caressing her wet cheeks, making her look up at me. Just as gently, I then brought her face forward and planted a kiss on her forehead.

"I don't blame you for whatever happened in the forest. Pansy.. She was already dying, you heard what Professor McGonagall said today in her office... When I felt my ring call out to me, I was so damn scared. Gods, those few minutes while I looked everywhere for you... All I knew then was that I couldn't afford you being harmed on my watch, not now, not ever." I confessed, my heart oddly pounding against my ribcage.

"Pansy had been one of the few people I could call a friend. She was a terrifying bitch," I continued with a soft smile. Hermione let out a small snort, "But she understood... She was perhaps the only person at Hogwarts who understood what was going on with me." I had absolutely no idea why I was still talking but for once, instead of feeling apprehensive, I felt relieved; as if a huge weight had been lifted off my chest.

Through out the week, I had spent pretending like nothing had happened. I had tried to keep my cool and only visited Pansy's grave once, which was located in the little cemetery on the outskirt of Hogsmeade. Truth be told, I didn't know how to express myself. I'd never been through something like this. And even if I had, I was never given the liberty to be carried away with my emotion.

It was silent, as my mind drifted to other things, and we sat like that for a long time, feeling visibly more relaxed.

*****

"That was a tough one." Finnigan exclaimed as we made our way back to the Castle. The gloomy sky had begun to turn even darker, as thick clouds hovered above, ready to melt away all that snow and leave behind muddy puddles all over the grounds.

"Those Beauxbaton girls have some real tricks up their sleeves y'know. All this time I just noticed the pretty faces.." Thomas replied, looking back over his shoulder towards the distant group of girls huddled around the white horses that pulled their carriages.

"Excuse me? What did you just say? Pretty who?" His girlfriend who was a Hufflepuff, intoned, giving him a sharp look. He shut up instantly which made everyone snicker.

"That's what I thought.."

I headed to the dungeons from the Entrance Hall, looking forward to getting changed into fresh clothes. I chanced a look around for Hermione but she was not among the crowd.

Come to think of it, I had not seen her at the game either. She had worked all night to get some break so she could enjoy the match, yet she hadn't apparently made it to the game.

I was pulled out of my thoughts mid-way down the stairs as I heard my name being called, "Mr. Malfoy!"

I turn around to find Professor McGonagall standing at the top of the stares, a grave expression on her face. I felt an odd sinking in my stomach. My legs felt like jello as I made my way back up to her, all sorts of thoughts racing through my head.

"What happened Professor?" I asked, before she could say anything.

"You need to come with me for a moment," she said, with a frown.

"Is-Is Hermione alright?" I couldn't stop myself from asking. Professor stopped in her way up the grand staircase and gave me a frowned look.

"Heavens, yes. She's fine.. Just a little surprised I guess," she replied, quickening her pace. I didn't know what to say further so I silently followed her all the way up to the Hospital Wing. Stopping outside, she turned to me,

"Miss Granger found her lying unconscious outside the Room of Requirement this morning." She explained, before stepping aside to let me into the wing. Feeling a terrible sense of foreboding wash over me, I stepped inside.

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