𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘺 » 𝘻𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘺 (𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦𝘥)

twelve

harry and i kissed non stop after that. they were short and sweet. his lips were cold, but soft and felt extremely feminine in contrast with mine; warm, rough but delicate. harry would let out a small giggle every time my nose brushed against his. the kiss shared with him wasn't like any other person i had kissed before. it was soft, tender, and meaningful. even with the circumstances of harry not being exactly human. it still felt real.

when we finally pull away, we both stare into one another's eyes, staying quiet. his stormy gray eyes boring into my honey brown ones. no words were shared between us, and a smile starts to make its way onto harry's face. i smile as well, licking my lips and they taste strangely sweet. was it because of harry's soft lips that were against mine seconds ago?

"z."

"hm?" i had removed my hands from his face to where one arm was draped over him and the other was rested against the top of his head, playing with his hair.

"t-that was my first kiss." he says quietly, his pale cheeks tinting pink slightly. my mouth pops open in surprise, but then i remembered. the way he was raised, he wasn't ever allowed to go anywhere, or to be around people or interact. of course that would be the reason for him not being able to experience things most teens our age do. he never had the opportunity like anybody else did, and it was saddening to think about, being caged up all your life, especially at a young age. not even being able to see and do things before he suffered his own death.

but i strangely felt glad that i was his first kiss.

"for your first time, you sure are good. better than anyone i've ever kissed." i wink at him. harry giggles and blushes, shaking his head, nuzzling his head into my palm slightly.

"stop, you're just saying that." he whispers. i shake my head, dipping down slightly to make eye contact with him.

"i meant that harry." i say sincerely, not being able to control these sudden feelings coming over me. i suddenly felt closer to him. like i wanted to protect him from any and everything, care for him, and love him. it was like a strong pull towards him, and these emotions crowding my mind. perhaps those feelings had always been there and this moment brought them out of me.

"okay." he says timidly, blinking as he stares into my eyes, his eye lashes fluttering. and it never hit me until now, how beautiful he was. he was absolutely flawless and it makes me wonder how someone could ever think to hurt, let alone murder such a creation. he made me question myself deeply about my sexuality. i hadn't once ever kissed a boy, but the kiss shared between us, it felt natural. like it was meant to be, and that it was not the last one that will be shared. and to be honest, i don't think i wanted it to be the last.

"has anyone ever told you that you're beautiful?" i asked.

"n-no." he replies, sounding flustered. i lean forward pressing my lips to his briefly, before i pull away.

"well you are."

"t-thank you." harry giggles cutely, and then hides his face behind his hands. i laugh at how adorable he looks. i grab his hands, pulling them away from his face, smiling at him. he snickers, puckering his lips and i don't hesitate to peck him on the lips once more. this could definitely become a thing. "z, can we watch neetflix?" he asks, still saying netflix incorrectly. but i ignore it and nod.

"cartoons?"

"no, let's watch something new please. i wanna see something other then cartoons." he says softly. i nod, reaching over and grabbing my ipad off the charger and unlocking it, clicking into the netflix app. practically the only app i used anymore on my ipad since we're always on it and i never do anything else cause i spend my time with harry most of the day.

"category?"

"romance please." he says, sounding like a small child. i chuckle and scrolls to the romance section, looking through the movies. "that one!" harry exclaims after a while. i nod and clicks on the movie titled "divergent". harry starts wriggling around to get comfortable, and lies his head on my chest, while i sit my ipad on my lap on its stand, and wraps my arm around him, getting comfortable.

.

after we finished up with the movie, we decided to do something fun. which ended up being messing around with my bratty sisters. they were in the kitchen, attempting to bake muffins, and harry kept making things move around when they weren't looking and replacing it with other ingredients, making them feel like they were going insane.

i was laughing my ass off, trying to keep from making any noises, but seeing them freak out and get mad whenever one of them couldn't find something, was too funny. soon, when we figured they had had enough of it, we stopped and went into the living room, settling on the sofa.

the tv was off and it was quiet, nothing could be heard but my sisters talking in the kitchen. i grazed my hand over harry's side gently as he cuddled against me and i could tell it was his favorite thing to do. he said it made his body feel warm, and more alive. he hasn't been able to touch anybody for a long time before i came along, he was always cold and i know it must be miserable not to have any human body contact for so long.

he needed warmth and affection. he needed me.

"z?" harry says, as his head rests against my chest.

"yes?"

"i wonder what it feels like to have a beating heart." he whispers. and that statement makes my heart clench.

"harry.."

"the sound of yours is nice, i wish i still had one." he smiles sadly. i tighten my arms around him, feeling his sorrow engulfs me and the atmosphere around us changing.

"you will, soon." i promised him. feeling the sadness and hint of hope radiating off of him like the sun's ray.

"zayn?"

"hm?"

"thank you.." he says softly, playing with the hem of my shirt. i looked down.

"for what?" i asked quietly, twirling a finger around strands of his hair.

"because of you, i don't feel so empty anymore."

✝✝