LMPYITP: The Random Passages

And After All...

Maybe she was in the kitchen fixing tea. And bacon sandwiches. With extra butter.

I got out of bed and headed towards the kitchen. I couldn't smell any cooking or hear the kettle boiling and I started to worry.

"Blue?" I called again but still received no answer.

She couldn't have left. Not then. Things were going too good.

"Blue!" Maybe if I called enough she'd finally answer. The flat wasn't that big so there weren't too many places she could hide.

I went back to the bedroom and that's when I noticed something. 'Her bags are gone.' I mused.

Her bags had been right there by the door. With her flight tags still on them.

'Don't panic.' I told myself. 'Maybe she's just gone to the shops or summat.'

I run out of milk. Maybe she noticed that and went to get more. She always kept an eye on that sort of thing because fuck knows I didn't.

'That has to be it.' I reasoned. 'That has to be fucking it.'

But it wasn't.

It fucking wasn't.

She never came back. I was sat there waiting watching the front door but she never came back.

A few days later, I found out where she'd gone.

And to say I was fucking pissed about it didn't even scratch the surface.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" I screamed from my lungs as I stood on the front step. "You tell me you love me then you just fuckin' disappear? What the fuckin' hell is your problem?!"

She tried to calm me down but I wasn't fucking having that...until she grabbed my wrist and made me.

We went to some park and sat on a bench near where some kids were playing footie. I lit a cigarette as I tried to keep myself from blowing up.

"I'm still fuckin' pissed at ya, y'know."

And she fucking did know.

I asked her about Noel because how else was I gonna figure out how the fuck she ended up back at his gaff?

"We never broke up." She said.

What the fuck?!

"Shit!" She exclaimed. "Liam! I'm-"

But I didn't want to hear it. I couldn't fucking hear it. It hurt too fucking much.

"I can't do this bull shit no more, Blue."

I really couldn't. I was too fucking tired and my heart just couldn't take the breaking any longer.

"I won't ask you to." She said with tears in her eyes.

I didn't think she'd cry about it but in a way, I was happy she did. I was glad I wasn't the only one getting hurt in this.

"Have fun in Scotland, yeah?"

I got up and left. There was no way I could've stuck around.

And she didn't even try to get me to.

The whole way back to my flat I thought about what I should do next.

She was going to fuck off again.