The Crayon Chronicles

Not all Blondes do Backflips: Paul and George Simms

Chompy: We're getting sidetracked and there are a lot more questions. Can we get to the next one, please?

Paul and George: (nods)

Chompy: So, when's your guys' birthday?

George: We were both on September 9, 1996. I was born thirteen minutes before Paul –

Paul: That makes me the middle child –

George: Hey, diva-slob, there isn't a middle child – we're considered one birth –

Paul: Yes, but you were still born before me and I was born before Lennon so that –

George: It doesn't –

Chompy: Do you have the same height or is one of you taller than the other?

Paul: We actually justwent to the doctor's before we moved and we got a physical – George and I are exactly the same height.

George: 183 centimeters, to be specific. That should be a little over six feet tall.

Chompy: Wow, you guys are tall. (clears throat) So, let's talk about your family. I already know a bit about your parents from Lennon but if you could give me tell me more about, that'd be awesome.

George: Well, Mom and Dad are all for helping the less fortunate – they give to shelters all the time. They even get us to help out too.

Chompy: Really? What do you guys do to help?

Paul: When they work at the soup kitchen, they bring us along too –

George: But the best part's when we go to orphanages on random weekends or on Christmas –

Paul: Lennon wouldn't agree with you on that.

George: (frowns) Yeah, you're right. She wouldn't.

Chompy: Sorry. I'm confused. Why wouldn't Lennon think that going to the orphanages is a good thing?

Paul: Hey, she knows it's a good thing. But when we go there, she's … Well, she's more affected by it all.

Chompy: (laughs) You mean to say that Lennon Simms has a heart?

George: (smiles) I kind of get what you mean. That sister of ours … she's crass and blunt and sometimes a lot crazier than even she would admit to being. But she does have a heart.

Paul: Ditto on everything he said. Plus, she's actually nice to the people she likes – a.k.a. the people who don't piss her off.

Chompy: There seem to be a lot of that – of people who piss her off.

George: Not really. A lot of things can get on her nerves but not a lot of things genuinely piss her off. She's complicated, that one.

Paul: (claps his hand) That's the word I was looking for – complicated. Lennon Simms is definitely complicated.

Chompy: Really? I mean, you'd think by the way she talks, she's all what-you-see-is-what-you-get.