13 years of crippling pain
13 years of misery and hurt.
13 wonderful birthdays, where where you?
Year 1: Hey dad today I stood up for the first time. Where where you at?
Year 2: I saw mom crying for the first time. She was sobbing, yelling, screaming, begging God for someone to step up and help her raise me. Why weren't you there comfort her? She needs somebody.
Year 3: I walked for the first time, but after 4 steps I fell on my ass. Where were you?
Year 4: I can spell my name, crazy I know, I felt amazing. Where were you?
Year 5: Today was the first day of Kindergarten, men and women and their children stood in front of the school, but only my mom stood by me. I asked her why they had daddy's and i didn't, she whispered "he's gone honey" under her breathe. Dad what happened? Why did you leave?
Year 6: I found out that I look like you, my sister told me that. I wanna know what you look like dad. Did you want a boy? Is that why you left?
Year 7: Second grade is hard, the people call me very mean things. I don't know why, I actually cried. Why weren't you here to love and support me, to be someone I could lean on when the times were tough.
Year 8: It was my older sisters birthday, a boy came into my room... Let's just say he hurt me. I don't want to explain it, but dad why weren't you here to protect me?
Year 9: Moms depression drove her to drink. She cries more than she smiles. Drinks liquor more than water. Why is this happening? Why did you hurt her so bad?
Year 10: This man we are living with, he... he hit mom, and he dragged my older sister across the floor.. And he screamed at me. Dad why aren't you here to save the day?
Year 11: Someone explained to me why I don't have a dad aka you. I wanted to stab myself, because I came to the terms that you weren't coming back.
Year 12: Lots of things happened this year. moms on drugs, she's in prison, I'm living with my friend. I don't understand why this is happening. Before mom got locked up she told me your name 'Michael England'. Man I want to meet you and scream at you for leaving me. Dad Why did you leave?
Year 13: I no longer give a shit about you at all. I hope you are happy with yourself for fucking up my life. I have one last question for you dad. What makes someone become a dick like you Dad or should I say Michael?
-Hailey Bracken
