Rip My Limbs

Her Loss

She peered over the edge. The apartment building, never feeling so fragile, could be a suspect for her murder. However, the railing even more so as she began to climb onto it.
Was this really it? That was all the fight she had left? She was so afraid. Not afraid of the pain, not even death itself. She was afraid of surviving. She didn't want to. That feeling, she loved it so. It reminded her she was still alive, so she hated it. Than how could she like it? Even in her last moments, she still wanted to be her cowardice self.
She finally got up the railing. She took her last step forward. Tears soaked her bloodied shirt. Why had the world let one person feel so much pain, all at once?
She was about to die, and her demise would be a horrible one. Everyone would miss her, but it wouldn't be her real self.
She fell, down, but it was short lived. Someone grabbed her wrist as she was about to fall.
"What the fuck are you thinking?" He asked.
***
24 Hours Earlier

My name is Melina, I have black hair. My eyes are green. I'm on the dance team. Most of my friends are popular or nerdy. That's how it is at school, however, at home, I'm completely different.
"Mel, wanna go with us to the ice cream shop after school?" Rose asked me.
"I have softball practice after school," I lied.
"Just tell me what team you're playing for!" She begged.
I walked home with my little brother and his 2 friends.
"So, what do you guys wanna do?" I asked.
That's right. I'm a total loser. I play with kids over my friends. I like it that way, and I don't want to change. Maybe it's because as a child I never did anything fun.
And some of you might say, "That's normal! Kids are cute!" But 1. All of the people at my school hate children. And 2. Do you spend extensive amounts of time with children to the point where the only reason you have a phone is the apps that you think kids like?
Buzz. Buzz. I got a call. I turned off the phone.
"Let's go to McDonalds!" Nick, my 5 year old brother, suggested.
"We just went there yesterday, though!" One of his friends complained.
"How about we go to an amusement park?" I suggested.
"Mhm!" His other friend said.
We got to the house and I changed into my suitable clothes. It was a costume of a bunny, but slightly stylized for women. That means it's a dress with a bunny tail that comes with ears. And I wore these kinds of costumes every day. Still think I'm normal?
We drove down to the amusement park. It wasn't really fancy, but it was enough entertainment for me.
"Ooh! Is that a boat?" Justin asked.(My brothers friend)
"Wanna ride it?" I smirked.

We all got on the boat.. I.. I thought... It'd be fun.. I just.. I did okay?
Well.. This quickly became the worst day.. Ever..
We were riding in the boat, and they let another boat drive in the water with us. Fine, right? No.
These were motor boats. Meaning there were deadly little fans on the back of the boats. Those things can kill animals, y'know? They weren't safe for kids. I certainly wasn't qualified to drive it, and that amusement park I went to wasn't up to safety standards.
   The boat in front of us slammed the breaks, and we didn't have enough time to stop. We ran into them. The kids flew off the boat. They weren't wearing the safety belts. Why..? I thought..
   I watched my brother try and get out of the water, and I immediately jumped in after him. All of the sudden, they started there boat up again. I began to swim up to my brother when... He couldn't see, y'know.. He was drowning. He managed to grab onto their boat before it drove off. He stuck his leg straight into the fan.. His leg got cut.. Over and over.. It made him let go of the boat. They just kept going. Like Nick wasn't getting his leg cut off. It separated, and Nick started drowning. Come on! I was so close to him. I grasped him, now unconscious. I began to swim back so shore when..  I saw the other kids.. They.. Weren't moving anymore.. Limp bodies I could've saved. What.. What do I do? What do I do? I brung my brother to shore.
   They'd already called 911, and when I got out of the water they sent my brother and I to the ER.
    On the way there, my brother, went into immediate surgery. Unexpectedly, he woke up.
   "Please stop crying buddy, I know it hurts. No, stop it!" I pleaded with him.
    They'd applied the anesthesia, and he'd gotten quieter.
  He hadn't been asleep yet, and he grabbed my hand.
  "Hey, sissy." He looked at me.
"What is it?" I held his hand.
  "I love you, so much," He closed his eyes, letting my hand go.
   "I love you, too," I said to him.