Welcome to Envy Park

First Interview

I was (am) a self-starter. A doer. I had initiative. I was self-motivated. Back in the early days of our friendship, it was Roxie giving me a panicked phone call at random times of the day, asking for the answer to number 3 or cab money or a sanitary pad. I was never caught unprepared for these major life moments. I ran straight for the major life moments before they even thought of getting to me.

So Roxie, surely wanting to show off, didn't just say "Sure, I'll find you a job." I talked to her on Saturday. A person from her company's HR called me on Sunday. And by Monday afternoon, I was in a fancy waiting room in her building, wearing a blazer, a smart-looking dress, and heels.

"Do people work on Sundays now?" I told her.

"They do for me," she said.

Point taken, Roxie.

But I did know that she was a big shot by now. We were in touch the whole time I was away, and in between telling each other about guys we dated, we talked about work. Her work stories became more and more, well, mature over time. Some people she used to call "sir" or "ma'am" she began addressing by their first names. Eventually her daily annoyances weren't about arrogant bosses, but disappointing assistants.

She became the (arrogant) boss, I realized, at some point.

What was I expecting? That my people and my hometown would be frozen in time? It felt that way on my annual visits, but it was silly to think that nothing had changed.

My own stories stayed the same, for the most part. I worked on short-term contracts that didn't allow for promotion or growth. It was like they knew I was just there to make rent and save up. No one really asked me if I wanted to be more and do more.

Good thing I was wearing a blazer. This waiting room was cold. I'd been in Roxie's office building before. Was it always this cold?

My phone lit up with a message. My mother: You might want to meet my friend Yoly who has that events company--

There was more, but I was allergic to messages from her of this type. I didn’t even read the entire thing.

Roxie got me an interview with a guy named Jonas. He was apparently two years younger than both of us. Already, not a good sign, but I was playing along. I did need a job.

"What does a project consultant do exactly?" was his first question, right after shaking my hand. I hadn't even gotten comfortable in the black shaky swivel chair across the table from him yet.

"Well, um," and as soon as the syllables left my mouth I knew it was a weak opening. "You mean my most recent job? I moved to a company that had just undergone a restructuring, and was part of the new CEO's transition team."

He was very well-dressed. Bright tie, sort of psychedelic print, could swear it moved when I turned my head. "And that included clerical stuff like filing?"

I cleared my throat. "Data organization, yes."

"You weren't there a long time."

"I decided not to extend my contract and come home instead, yes."

"And previous to that, you were also a consultant."

"Yes, I explain there the projects I managed..."

"Moira. Am I pronouncing that correctly?"

"Yes, that's right."

"Moira." Jonas said that right, but it felt foreign the way he just pounded it out of his mouth and into the room. "Your Roxanne's friend, right? So I guess I can be frank with you and tell you exactly what I need."

"Of course."

"Based on your resumé, I really think you're the most qualified for this position than all the other applicants. I've been rushing to fill this job and I've been looking for months. I like that you can file things, that you can organize, that you were in a transition team, that you worked for international firms. I need someone who can quickly set up product teams for me, and then have them go on their way when they're ready. You seem a little too qualified, actually."

"Thank you."

"I'm just concerned that you're Roxanne's contemporary."

"I'm sorry?"

Jonas touched the knot on his tie and then slid his fingers down the length of it. "How do I explain this. You're the contemporary of Roxanne, who is manager level, and you will be reporting to me, assistant manager level."

"I work with the people I work with. I don't care about ranks and positions."

"Are you sure about that?"

Was this going well? It didn't feel like it was going well. "If there's anything I learned when I worked away from here, it was just to do the work. People come and go."

"Why, Moira? Were you planning to 'come and go'?"

Did Roxie not tell him that I intended to leave by June? "I may be leaving Manila again in a few months, yes."

Jonas was surprised. "A few months? You weren't intending to stay even if you got this job?"

"I'd consider staying longer if the job was worth it, of course."

He leaned back against his chair. "Well that's the issue then, isn't it, Moira? Should I even offer you the job knowing you're half out the door already?"

His demeanor had changed, and I knew that the interview was over.

I forgot what I said next, and what he said next. I kept it pleasant, and shook his hand when I left, but didn't feel like finding Roxie to chat about it, even though she was just two floors down.

I went home instead.