Everything

Prologue

I was always the one everyone expected to fail. No matter what I did and how hard I tried, it was never good enough for them; I was never good enough for them. To them, I'm just a disappointment, someone who will never make it far in life and someone that was just a mistake. I was only 10 when my family told me this.

Imagine a 10-year-old sitting in front of you, eyes filled with wonder and love and light, while you tell them that they would never amount to anything and then watching that light in their eyes, that last glimpse of hope, vanish. A 10-year-old that had so much to offer the world but now believed they couldn't because you told them they couldn't. But no one had to tell me this; I always just sort of knew.

I was three when mom left and that meant I had to grow up with a missing piece. I was eight when dad met someone new and he was finally happy. I was nine when I witnessed her destroy him. I was ten when he destroyed himself and everyone saw me as his spitting image. I was thirteen when I made that first slash to my wrist. I was fourteen when I was admitted to the hospital for a suicide attempt and left broken. By the time I hit fifteen no one cared what I did anymore. Now I'm seventeen and on a train to start a new life. A life where I can finally be the person I always wanted to be. A place where no one knows me and I can start over. I need to do this for me because if I don't, I know there will no longer be a me. This is my last chance to be happy and with everything I had gone through, I deserve this chance. So I packed up my things at one in the morning and left by three. No call, no letter, no note, no nothing. I just left everyone, the same way they left me.