Before We Say Goodbye

Chapter Two: A Face is a Book

Chapter Two - Damon

My face scares people, I think.

Not my brother, though. He’s not scared of me. He understands that a face is no more than that – a face.

Like a book cover is no more than a cover. It’ll hint at what’s inside, but it doesn’t tell you much. It could have the prettiest cover in the world…and hold the crappiest story. Or the cover could be plain and dull, a cloth cover. But the story itself could be amazing.

My face is, for lack of a better word, ugly. Scary. Different.

My story is tragic. But amazing.

What hurts me most is that my little sister is scared of me now. She doesn’t believe I’m the same old Damon Matthews. She refuses to. Ever since I came back from the hospital, she’s avoided me like I’m the plague.

She’s only four, she doesn’t know what’s going on, but it still hurts. Every time she rushes out of a room when it’s just me in their, every time she refuses to sit next to me at breakfast, it feels as though she’s tearing off a corner of my heart, tearing and tearing till there’s nothing left.

“Quit moping around,” Paul yells, chucking a pillow at me.

Ugh. Sometimes it bugs me that he doesn’t treat me any nicer than he used to.

But I would hate for him to act like I’m weak, fragile, when I’m not.

I grab the Wii controller and wave it at him. “Wanna play?” I ask.

He nods. “Sure. Mario Kart?”

I pretend to think about it. Like there’s any thought necessary! Kart is the best thing since sliced bread.

“Hmm,” I say, “well that’s a toughie…”

“To play, or not to play?” Paul says. “I totally agree.”

“Get ready to have your arse kicked to the middle of next week, Paulie-Boy!” I laugh.

I miss this. I mean, I miss doing this with my mates. Paul’s awesome, but he’s not Kyle. Back before the accident, Kyle and I were like the boy version of BFFL’s. Now we’ve drifted apart. I think I embarrass him.

“Yeah, right,” Paul scoffs.

I know he won’t go easy on me. Everyone else does, and it annoys me no end. I mean, I have a bunch of scars on my face, sure. But I can still play Wii, for crying out loud! It’s not like I have no hands!

“Right, I’ll set it up, you get some crisps,” Paul orders.

I leave the room and head to the kitchen, ready to grab some Pringles. Maddie is sitting at the table with her colouring book, drawing quietly. She’s always been quiet.

“Hey,” I say, hoping against hope that maybe, just maybe, today she’ll like me. Today she won’t be scared.

She looks up, and her eyes widen. She presses herself against the back of her chair, as far away from me as she can.

“Please don’t hurt me,” she whimpers.

I draw a chair opposite her suddenly. She flinches at the unexpected movement.

“Look, Maddie. I’m still Damon. I’m still your big brother, who used to give you piggy-back rides round the garden. Remember?”

“Damon!”

“What do you want, Maddie?”

Maddie looks hurt. “Why are you angry, Damon?”