Memories.

Chapter 1

It was cold, and hard. Not just the chair in my mother's hospital room that I've been sleeping in for the past three days. But also the reality that I've been facing for the past year, without any exceptions I had to adapt to my new lifestyle. Living with a cancer sick mother, two smaller siblings I have to care of and my suicidal father. It's hard to explain of how I had gotten to this position in life, but all I can say is that things change in a blink of an eye. I remember sitting with my family on the dinner table of our old house, laughing, smiling, like if life couldn't get any better. I remember examining my mother's worried expression, playing around with her food, in silence, and thinking how odd of her that was. Odd. Then the next minute hearing my mom's morbid and troublesome words coming out of her mouth. Ruining my entire lifestyle, breaking my heart, breaking my view in life, breaking my dreams, goals and Breaking everything else that ever mattered to me, even myself. I wasn't mad at her, I was worried for her knowing that she had to face a new reality, dealing with time and her health. Cancer, such simple word that can turn your life around when mentioned by one of your family members.

I sat up in my chair inspectioning the room, then after a few moments of realizing it was time to get the day started, I got up and walked over to my helpless mother. She was asleep, with a tired expression on her face, seeing all these cords around her disturbed me and brought chills down my spine. My poor mom all she did for me and my family, and now she still had to suffer... it wasn't fair. I walked into the restroom and started brushing my hair and getting myself cleaned up. You know, the things normal girls do in their mornings before going to school, or on date with some guy. That wasn't my case, I had no school to attend to or a guy my heart belonged to. My life was to complicated for that, instead, I have home school and a Black Retriever named, Chip. Ever since my mother was diagnosed with leukemia I stopped attending public school and started homeschooling, which benefited me with enough sleep and gave me the chance to care of my family. Chip was the only living thing I actually enjoyed being with, he was there for me, and as a loyal dog, he loved me too. We had special permission to let Chip in the hospital and into mom's room, since he helps mom relieve stress and all that medical stuff. But mostly he helps me sleep at night by letting me cuddle up to him and use him as my pillow. Companionship, was the connection Mom and I had with chip. He was and is special in different days. I remember getting him as a surprise before Christmas, and the reason I called him 'Chip' was because I had an obsession with chocolate chip cookies when I was eleven.

He was one of the things that stayed with me after moving from Florida to Texas. I was originally born in Austin, TX but mom and dad decided to move out to Florida when they found out mom was pregnant with Josh. I was about two when this hapenned, so I didn't have any emotional connection to any person that may have caused pain when I knew we were leaving. But reason I wanted to move was because, Florida equals Disney. Disney World was by far my most favorite place in the world.
During the summer Disney world would be my get away, for The next thirteen years it was and I never got bored of it. Lots of memories like Disney stick to me ever since I left, and it's hard to let go, because you meet special people during those few years of your life that turn out to be important to you. Memories thank God they exist.