Survivor

S.O.S

Pathetic, insignificant, loser, trash,

You put me down for me to burn and crash,

Idiot, moron, a mistake that shouldn't've been born,

I try to be strong, when inside I'm torn.

Bruises, cuts and broken bones,

"Everything's fine, just leave me alone."

As if school's not enough, my problem goes deeper,

Where I can hide behind doors and meet the Grim Reaper,

I look in the mirror and do you know what I see?

An image which I question, "Is that really me?"

A cut lip and a black eye,

Not even with time, can it hide,

No point in covering up, not point in hiding,

Because every time I see my scars, I end up crying.

Shrieking, weeping, sobbing, wailing,

On the ship of depression I'm sailing,

Laughing, screaming, my mind is gone,

There's still some sanity left, but not for long,

The waves go high, and the ship goes falling,

I expect now that Death is calling,

Ring, ring, ring, ring,

That's my cue,

Death greets me,

With a 'How do you do?'

We talk for a while, but nothing happens,

I have yet to feel Death's sharp talons,

I heave a sigh and open my eyes,

I'm back in my room, in this world of lies,

I'm hurt, I'm stressed and it's all too much,

Expectations, desires, all I want to crush,

Look at ME, talk to ME, my life's a mess,

My heart is dying, all my emotions I detest.

Abuse me, kill me, do whatever you want,

I can't fight back, I'm too tired and I just can't,

Gun shots, blood splatter, it's all in my head,

But with how I am now, I might as well be dead.

Up to this point you must be bored,

These same old words, you've heard before,

When life gets hard, you say you're all hurt,

But you don't know true pain, I'm just being curt.

A scrape here and there, maybe a push or a shove,

You start saying things like you'll never be loved,

Only people won't judge YOU, because they care,

But think about the people who don't have people there.

Now I'm begging on my knees, so just listen for a minute,

Don't shove these words off and treat it as a gimmick,

Counselling and therapy, all of them are useless,

You say you want to help us, yet you're all still clueless,

People like us, we don't have a voice,

So we wear our masks, do we really have a choice?

Each day a different one, all cracked and used,

Yet still nobody can see us, the emotionally abused.

You say, 'It will get better.' 'There's still tomorrow.'

Yet, why do these words fill me with sorrow?

The answer to that is simple and straight,

It's because YOU DON'T CARE!

You want to help, so you say these things,

But our minds are broken, too far and too lost,

We can't handle kind words from other people,

And in the end we hurt ourselves as a cost.

We just want to stop, we want it to end,

But here we are waiting, for that one special friend,

For somebody to take off the mask and look at US,

To smile, to laugh, and especially trust,

We deny and deny, sweet words to us,

Because now we think, 'Why couldn't you be kind at first?'

Although I'm not saying we have the right to overreact,

I'm just saying that we're being careful, and that's a fact.

We're hard to understand and it takes time, I know,

But people like us, need more time to grow,

We've been through a lot and it has not been smooth,

But after being through all that, there's really nothing else to lose.

My words here are crazy, complicated and cryptic,

But the truth is, I'm being realistic,

Life in this world is kill or be killed,

But people like me, are rebels.

They try to gun us down and kick us around,

Some of them fall, but others astound,

Life is a highway, and we are the riders,

I've gone through hell, but I'm a survivor.