I woke up to a head ache. I hated days like this. I never went out but I made sure that when I did, I made it a night to remember. I had to save and plan in advance to make the trip into town to go dancing. I'd drank entirely too much last night and I wanted to stay in bed all day and never get out and why would I? I have nothing to get out of bed for.
No boyfriend.
A crap job.
No family.
I took a deep breath and rolled over, looking at the time on the clock next to my bed.
7:08am it flashed at me. My eyes grew twice their size and I jumped out of bed.
"Crap!" I yelled and rushed towards the bathroom. I had to be to work by eight and it took me forty minutes to get there on the bus. I was so going to be late today.
I showered so quickly I don't think the water actually touched my skin and I pulled on the first uniform I could find.
I worked at a diner in town. I'd moved to this little nothing town five years ago after I planned on just "passing through." It turned into me sleeping here one night, then one week and before I knew it five years had passed.
"Damn it, Lara. Why are you always late?" I smiled at my boss, David as I passed. I could literally feel the heat radiating off his body from being so upset.
"Sorry, David. It won't happen again." I smiled up at him shyly as I passed but his frown only deepened.
David was one of the most handsome men that I'd ever met. He was tall with dark hair and these eyes that I always felt could look through me. He never smiled. I'd worked here four and a half years and never once had I seen him smile.
"Lara, I called you last night to work but you didn't answer." I blinked a few times, swallowed and thought quickly about a lie.
"My phone died. I'm sorry." I didn't look up at David because he always seemed to know when I wasn't being honest. I thought I was a great liar but with David, nothing ever passed by him.
"Really?" The way he said that one word made me flinch. Why was I afraid of him? Why was I unable to be strong around him?
"Uh, no. I'd rather not talk about it if it's all the same to you." I tied my apron around my waist and walked towards the kitchen. "Bye, David," I said as I peaked over my shoulder. His angry look was going and replaced with something else I'd never seen from him. Jealousy.
"So how was your night, Lara?" Mavis asked me as I cleaned a table a few hours later. I smiled and looked around the diner before I answered. Mavis was like a mother to me. A beautiful, older, black mother with more worldly experience in her pinkie finger than I'd ever hope to have in all my life.
"It was just okay. I don't think I did it right." I placed the dirty dishes in the tub and wiped the table down.
"Honey, you can't doing drinking and dancing wrong." Mavis laughed a bit but I knew she wasn't laughing to be mean. "Did you sleep with-" I quickly placed my hand over her mouth and looked towards the office door.
"Don't, Mavis. David may hear you." I looked around again and removed my hand just as Mavis licked my palm.
"Gross!" I said loudly and pulled my hand back.
"Honey, I'll show you things to do with a tongue that are nothing close to gross."
"Mavis, Lara, get back to work." David yelled from the back room. I jumped but Mavis just rolled her eyes.
"Later, I want all of the details." Mavis pointed at me and I just nodded my head.
Another five hours and almost a hundred people later, my shift was over. I waved goodnight to everyone and went into the back room to change my shoes and take my apron off.
"Alright, Lara. Spill it." Mavis popped out of no where, scaring me half to death.
"Jesus. Where did you come from?" I placed my hand over my heart in hopes to calm down.
"Watch your tongue, you." Mavis pointed at me and smiled. "Spill it. What do you think you did that was so wrong?" Sitting down, I placed my head in my hands and took a deep breath.
"I danced with a few guys. There was this one guy that was really cute. He asked me to go home with him and when I suggested it, he told me he'd meet me by the front door in ten minutes but never showed up. I went to the rest room to make sure I was presentable and then went to grab my bag. I waited by the front door for almost an hour. I looked around and he never showed. It was like he vanished." I felt so stupid acknowledging out loud that I'd been stood up at a bar. I wasn't even good enough for some stranger.
"Oh, Lara." Mavis sat down next to me and I placed my head on her shoulder as her arm wrapped around my shoulders. "Men are dogs. Maybe he wasn't the right one and that's okay. You can't give up though. The right man is out there."
I took a deep breath and sat up straight. "Thanks, Mavis. I'm going to head home now." I stood up quickly and untied my apron, throwing it in my locker and slipping on my nike's.
"Lara," Mavis said my name as I wiped my cheek. It was so stupid for me to be crying but I was almost twenty and I'd never been in a real relationship. I'd kissed a few boys but I'd never really been in a place long enough to make a real connection like that.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Mavis." I made my way to the back door with my eyes filled with tears. I closed my eyes for a second and just before I opened them, slammed into something hard.
I opened my eyes to see David looking down at me with concern. His green eyes searched my face for answers.
"Lara?" David spoke softly.
"Please don't," I said as he placed my back on my feet. I pulled away and ran out the back door into the night.
Running as fast as I could, My heart was pounding so hard I thought it would pump out of my chest. I couldn't catch my breath and I wanted to drop to the ground but something in me just kept telling me to run. My legs felt like they had a mind of their own, pushing on when my mind was telling me to stop.
"Lara," someone whispered and I stopped. I was breathing hard, my breath coming out in visible puffs in the cold weather. I looked around me slowly, unsure of who'd spoken.
"Who's there?" I asked loudly.
"Lara." The voice was clearly male and more distant than the first time. My eyes grew wider as I turned around and looked back towards the diner.
"David," I whispered as I saw him standing in the doorway, watching me run. Not happiness but something else came over me, knowing David was watching me. I saw him take a step in my direction and out of reflex I took one away from him.
"Stop," I heard someone say but I couldn't stop. I had that urge, that need to run. I turned quickly and ran into the darkness, not caring where I ended up.
**********
"Mavis, what was that about?"
"David. You just had to go follow her to the club last night, didn't you? You couldn't let her have one night and get just a bit of life experience?" I heard Mavis' words but I couldn't take my eyes off of Lara's retreating body. She was running home in the dark and I could feel her embarrassment and pain. I took a step forward but Mavis' hand on my arm stopped me.
"Just let her go. You would only make it worse tonight." There was a long pause and Mavis spoke again. "You know you'll have to tell her soon, don't you? You know that the longer you hide this from her, the more angry she will become towards you?"
I frowned deeper at her words but didn't speak. "Umhmm..." I mumbled.
Mavis knew that I was going to follow Lara home, just like I did every other night. She shouldn't be walking home in the dark alone but I was too scared to ask her if she wanted a ride. I was afraid of what she'd say and her telling me no wasn't an option.
Lara was mine and it was only a matter of time before I told her... before I showed her. I knew her black outs were getting worse but I was always there to make sure she was safe.
