Im laying here late at night in my bed wondering why did you give up
I know I had my flaws but you shouldve understood that i was scared
Now here I lie feeling so down because the first time i tried to say something to work it out you didnt even try
I guess it was toxic after all
Being together just wasnt right
Honestly I contemplated suicide that night and every time you crossed my mind.
I would take an infinte number of more beatings if it meant I could still be with you.
But you said it was over and you hoped we could still be good friends.
Thats a little hard considering the fact that Ill never be fully over you.
I still get the butterflies, and I still feel the pain everytime I see you
Its such a shame how you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me but I guess you didnt feel the same .
I cant even fake a smile anymore.
At this point I am broken beyond repair.
What upsets me the most is everytime my phone vibrates I have hopes that it is you.
But it never was nor will it probably ever be.
I knew it was a risk to fall for anyone but you just lured me in and I couldnt think straight and Ive now got more to cry about before I sleep hoping you wont haunt me in my dreams.
But Id rather consume the pain than let it hurt anyone else because afterall I am the monster in this nightmare.
But Ill get use to it.
Even though I will get use to it it doesnt mean It wont hurt itll always hurt.
But Id rather feel pain than nothing at all.
And I would never be happy I fear it, everytime I get too happy, something bad always happens. I guess you were just another case of my little Happy.
