Morning young Lightwoods!
Its evening Gideon
Well how would know I'm buried underground
I think you mean, "how would I know I'm 5 brain cells short of an ape"
You shouldn't say such things about yourself
I will not tolerate such behaviour from you
Tell that to Jason
...
And today we will be telling you about a modern wonder
I wouldn't call them a wonder unless I was getting rich of selling them in the black market
Braces!
Braces are basically torture devices for those who were unfortunate enough to be born with misshapen teeth
But in the end said unfortunate soul ends up with beautiful straight teeth
As straight as me
that's an aweful example
You dare say such things about me!
Oh it's a complement!
Teeth as straight as Jace Herondale can only be obtained after enduring years of pain and surviving without certain modern delicacys
Delicacys? I find them repulsive!
Coke isn't repulsive
And father always thought it would be me that ended up drugged and passed out in an alley
I think you might be reffering to Will
You only say that because you're in love with him
I thought we already agreed that I wasn't
You're still in denial I see
If I told you I love Will would you stop insisting?
You're admitting? YOU'RE ADMITTING!
What? no NO! I meant...
GABRIEL'S IN LOVE WITH WILL HERONDALE!!! GABRIEL'S IN LOVE WITH WILL HERONDALE!!!
*muttered chanting in the distance*
What was that?
Jason's just excited at this turn of events
*muffled hissing*
He really does like the idea of you and Will
Why is Jason even here?
Should we get on with the chapter?
Do we ever?
Yes sister, we always stay 100% on topic
Right, so...
When braces are installed into your mouth you get the pleasure of picking what colour they are
We suggest either red or black
Red so it looks like your teeth are bleeding and in the occurence of an event where you need to make a swift escape from the clutches of anothers words you can simply say your mouth is broken and dissolve into the histeria caused
And black because...
There is no explaination needed, just
Black
Black
Always black
Furthermore, when getting braces you must be prepared to look like a complete fool for the extent of your sentance
We suggest staying inside at all possible times or wearing a plastic bag over your head, one which you might fasten at the neck to produce your own personal bubble
Why do I feel like your advice may results in large expenses in the form of funerals
I haven't a clue
*hissing*
Jason knows
Jason's not even human, what does he know
*scratching*
I take it back
Too late
*shuffling, creaking*
Bye bye brother
YOU ARE READING
Lightwood Brothers Guide To Everything
FanfictionOnce upon a time I decided it would be a good idea to bring Gabriel and Gideon Lightwood back from the grave as ghosts Turns out it wasn't such a good idea... Now they want to offer the younger generation of Lightwoods advice on life... and there's...
