Falling to Pieces

Untitled Part 1

I can't feel my face. I am completely numb. The doctor puts a strong hand on my shoulder and says "I'm sorry Mr. Caylen, he's gone." 

Everything is out of focus, I cant see. I shake my head. Kian can't be dead. I saw him this morning laughing and smiling. He called me dick and tried to slap me. He ran around the house screaming with Hazey right at his ankles. He can't be dead.

But a part of me knows. I saw the wreckage, no one was walking out of that alive. I don't want to believe it. It can't be true, it must be a mistake. Kian is at home editing our new video, he must be. It must be the wrong Kian. The wrong jeep. It must be a mistake or a sick joke, right?

The door to the waiting room pushes open and our friends tumble in. Lia runs to me and hugs me close. "I'm so so sorry baby." she whispers into my hair. I inhale the sweet smell of her perfume as the tears finally escape from my eyes.

Sam followed by Connor, Ricky, and Trevor, run over to the doctor. "Where is he?!" demands Sam trying to keep his cool but his bottom lip is trembling.

"I'm sorry." is all the doctor says but they get it. A sob escapes from Sam's lips and he drops to the floor. Connor tries to keep it together for the sake of the others but he's failing. Tears run quietly down his cheeks but the noise inside our minds and hearts are screaming. Trevor falls into Ricky's big arms, both of them too shocked for tears just yet. 

"Where, where are his parents?" asks Andrea through sniffles. 

"Out of the country." Lia answers stroking my back as I sob into her shoulder.

"I loved him." Andrea says. "I loved him, and now he's gone. I'll never get to kiss him again."

"I know. I know." Lia reassures through her own tears, placing one of Andrea's hands in hers. 

I never thought I'd be here. In the waiting room of a LA hospital with all of my friends, grieving my best friend.