Their Paid Girl

Their Paid Girl - Part 19

          “Well, this is all my fault,” I stammered. “The gate, and Ebony riding off... It’s my fault, and—”

          “No, Shawna, it’s not,” Adam suddenly snapped at me. “Go take a bath.”

          And then he stalked off, swiping one hand through his thick hair, which was just as midnight-black as Ebony’s mane.

          I blinked fast to dispel the moisture that gathered in my eyes. “I’m sorry,” I said again.

          His father breathed out deeply. He seemed confused as he absently kissed his wife on the temple and followed his son, disappearing out of sight.

          I couldn’t look at his mother but I felt her stand, then place two gentle hands on my shoulders. “Don’t blame yourself, dear,” she said gently. “Adam should have taught you the basics about stopping and dismounting, before putting you on Ebony. It was a scary experience even for the bravest.”

          I gave a watery chuckle. Her words were honestly far too kind. “It wasn’t Adam’s fault. I should have told him—” I stopped, not wanting her to know that I hadn’t been honest with him about being scared. She probably thought that we knew everything about each other.

          I sensed her smile, even though I still avoided her gaze. “Don’t worry, Shawna. Not about the horse, because Ebony is fine. And don’t worry about the gate, because replacing it will be the easiest thing in the world.”

          “I’m so sorry,” I whispered, meaning it about more than just the horse episode. I was sorry for lying to her, too. Adam was right; I really needed to stop.

          “I’m worried about Adam,” I blurted, then mentally proceeded to hang myself. Why had I said that out loud?

          “Adam?” Mrs. Ferrell frowned.

          “Well,” I stammered, “He seemed so angry.”

          Mrs. Ferrell smiled. “I think he was angry with himself. For nearly hurting you. He’ll calm down soon, though, he always does. And everything will go back to normal.”

          But I didn’t want everything to go back to normal with Adam. I wanted it to be as different as our moment in the field after I’d fallen. I was tired of our hatred. But of course, I definitely couldn’t say that out loud.

          “Thank you,” I gave her a watery smile, finally looking up into her shattering, deep blue eyes that Adam had inherited. “For everything. But I don’t know when I’ll finally feel safe using the word ‘please’ again.”

          Mrs. Ferrell gave a tinkling, happy laugh. “Come on,” she grinned. “I think Adam was right about one thing today. You need a bath,” she teased.

          I looked down ruefully at the mud-spattered clothes. “Whoops.”

          She linked our arms together and I followed her into the house, wondering how soon Adam would return. We needed to talk.

***

          I was already curled up in bed, staring at my purple fake-engagement ring glinting in the light of my bedside lamp, when I finally heard Adam come in. Dusk had long since fallen and I had just been beginning to worry that the horses had escaped, when Adam and his father could be heard downstairs.