“Hey, gorgeous.” I smile walking towards her hospital bed. Savannah looks at me and tries to force on a smile. She’s weak, and we both know it. This is no good. The doctors say that Van doesn’t have much time left, a day or two. How was I meant to cope with that?
My girl was leaving me and there was nothing that I could do. Literally, nothing. Plus, I couldn’t fall apart right in front of her. No matter how tough I looked, I was breaking down inside and the girl knew it. I could see the pain in her eyes and most probably, she could see my own pain.
“Look what I have.” I picked up the bag and showed all the movies that I bought for her to watch. Savannah had a list of movies, that she wanted to watch and most of them were there. As a sincere smile made its way onto my girlfriends face, I couldn’t help but smile as well. “Glad you like my idea.” I add and sit down beside her bed.
“Come here.” She patted the bed with her hand, moving a little to the side to make space for me. “Could you stay with me tonight, please?” she asks. I wanted to stay. I really did but what were the doctors going to say? I had a free day tomorrow, so I would come to visit her and stay for the day. I smiled at her and nodded my head. I wasn’t going to leave her right now. She needed me and I needed to spend time with her so I’ll have enough memories of her in my thoughts.
I lied down beside her, wrapping my arms around her and turning on the telly, so we could watch the first movie. It was amazing how alive she was during those movies. We were laughing throughout each and every single movie; criticizing how people acted and maybe they were great actors, but we still notice their flaws within those movies.
Right now, it was midnight, and Savannah was slowly falling asleep in my arms, I kissed her forehead and tuned down the television. Her smile was so gentle and sweet, it seemed like she fell asleep, but little did I know that her thoughts didn’t let her.
“Lou,” she whispers suddenly. “Promise me something.” This is interesting. What would she want me to promise her? Maybe there was something I could do to ease her pain?
“Go on, love.” I say quickly because curiousness is killing me from the inside. I’ve always been a curious person and everybody knew it. Everybody, who knew me personally.
“Promise me, that you’ll find someone; someone better than me. Someone who will have the ability to love you the way I did, but stay with you forever. Promise, Lou, promise.” She urged and her request wasn’t what I expected. I was meant to fall for someone when obviously; I’m going to look for my Savannah in every girl that would pass by me. How was I meant to do that?
But she asked me to promise, and that was the consequence. I was meant to find someone, who’ll love me as much as she did; who’ll be with me through the good and the bad – just like she was. How was I meant to do that? I look down at her and her hazel eyes were staring into mine and there was nothing else I could do.
“I promise, Van. But no matter how great the person would be, you’ll always be the one, you know?” I ask. The blonde sits up and glares at me. The sadness in her eyes was killing me within seconds and the thought of her leaving was so hard to accept. I couldn’t bear in mind, that one day she’ll be gone. She was going to leave me all alone, with the pain in my heart. But it wasn’t her choice. It felt like she was forced to leave me; she was forced to leave me and make me insusceptible towards the pain of loss.
“You can’t say that, Lou. Don’t say that.” She snaps, dragging me out of my sorrow and bitterness. How could she say that? I wasn’t controlling my feelings. Savannah was the one who would always be on my mind, no matter who I would be with. “You’re making me feel bad for dying.” She carries on and her words stab me like a knife. What?!
