Life. Ironic, stupid, unfair, unjust, hateful life. The world will never change; the heart will never heal and is no better off than the shards of mirror that lay on the ground before her. She longs to reach out and to end it all. The ultimate final solution, to a temporary problem. It wont be like this forever and she knows this. The pain feels so real it hard to imagine that this is merely a simulation. One clearly constructed to advise against suicide.
You would think that by now, the 30th century no doubt, that the idea of taking ones own life would have died out. It hasn’t. I believe I am 1600 years of age in human terms and I am currently living in Arthtropa, It is a large facility on the red planet province. The Red planet is not actually red it is merely a nickname it has acquired over the years. The nickname representing the war, or rather wars.Over whelmed with blood one could not even open the door without being blinded from the sights they had received.
The once beautiful Elair had been reduced to ashes and dust, therefore deemed the Red planet. The wars started in 3004 nearly 20 years ago, the humans had discovered us long before that. They experimented on us, trying to dissect us, with the excuse that they were only trying to understand us but for every wound we suffered it healed before they could even prepare their instruments of torture. They taught us their language and we obliged to help them understand us as well. It wasn’t until later that I realized that they only wanted us for our abilities.
Every one of us has our own. Such as telepathy and the power over the elements. The humans could not gain access to our DNA or access our abilities due to the fact that we were physically immortal, undeniably indestructible. They wanted the supernatual powers that we possesed. This only angered them further and they tested and experimented on us trying to find a weakness that could eliminate us once and for all.
They had succeeded. On our home planet, before the humans, we knew nothing of death. So they established a toxic element of destruction spinning viral amongst us. The disease was called the depression; it started with a simple headache and led to feelings of despair. It made you feel as if everything that you knew was to never exist and the mere existence of yourself was obsolete.
This drove us to kill our selves; hundreds of thousands upon millions started this process of mass suicide. We knew that only we could kill ourselves. The humans found that we could not die unless we were willing to do so. Before the humans came and infected us with this disease we were not willing.
This whole process is what forces us to watch these horrendous videos. Videos that entice feelings of misery, agony, and pain. Ones that practically tear into our hearts as we recount the numerous mass suicides that occurred and are occurring.
The Depression has died out, at least for the most part. We had been changed to fit in with the human society, our appearance altered and our abilities stunted. That is all that exists now, except for the small camps like this one. Here in Arthtropa everyone has diverse abilities and are capable of much more than can ever be imagined. However in order to to keep our identities, our abilities, and of course our immortality we must remain out of contact with the depression in this facility we are however still slighty infected with the depression.
It is not as extreme now as it was earlier and we have grown accustomed to the feeling of emptiness. The Elis believes that watching these videos will help us cope and understand. I barely build the initiative to lift my head when one is playing.
I lay with my head down until i start hearing a constant murmur a blur of voices.." I could be normal. Why can’t I just pretend? How long will these feelings last? Will I ever be…" "Ariya"! I exclaim."You’re killing me!" I burst in a rather upsetting tone.
