In Search of Tomorrow ✓

Sixteen

My shoulders were shaking, but he kept his arm firmly around them and scooted closer to me, so that I was able to bury my face in his shirt. I forced myself to regain my breath, my tears staining his button-down, until I was able to talk again.

"My mom's not living," I said. "She's not on a business trip and she's not coming back. She died in a car crash, over two years ago. I was the only one in the car with her, and I was sitting in the passenger's seat. I should have seen the other car coming, but I was too preoccupied." I sniffed, my shoulders beginning to shake again. "It's all my fault."

"Of course it's not, Evelyn." Cameron ran his hand through my tangled hair, smoothing it down. "There's no way it's your fault. I'm just so sorry you didn't tell me before. I could have helped you." I hiccupped and he kissed the top of my head. "Everything's going to be okay. You'll be fine. You've had a shock, is all."

I exhaled shakily and blinked to clear my blurry vision, bringing the living room into focus. Cameron was still holding me and rocking me back and forth, and I could actually feel myself beginning to calm down.

"What about your dad?" he asked, his lips close to my ear.

I was nearly certain my heart actually stopped at that exact moment-at the very least, my breath caught and hitched in my throat so that I started coughing. By the time Cameron had patted my back sufficiently and I had cleared my windpipe, I knew what I had to do.

"Dad's out of town," I said in a muffled voice, keeping my face buried in his chest so that he didn't have to see my expression as I lied. "It's hard for him, working to earn enough money while taking care of us. That's why I have to watch my sisters so much. He's out of town a lot, on business trips, but we..." I sniffed again as another tear slid down my cheek. "We make it work."

"Oh, Evelyn." Cameron hugged me tighter, if that was at all possible. "I'm so sorry you kept this from me. But at least I know now. That explains everything. I knew you were hiding something from me, and I'm really sorry this is how I had to figure out."

I finally deemed it safe to retreat from the protection of his button-down, and I pulled back so that I could see his face. Though his pool-blue eyes looked clouded and sad, he was smiling at me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

He would never know that the sorry didn't just mean an apology for keeping things from him in the past, but also for the lie I'd just told him and the secrets I was still keeping locked safely away. People had known about Mom's death-it had been unavoidable. The school had received notice, Katie knew, Ashley knew...but nobody knew the truth about Dad.

"It's okay," he smiled back, taking my chin in one hand and kissing me lightly. "Everything's out in the open now. It's all fine."

I forced a small smile back, but the kiss had made me feel even more guilty, and I felt like I wanted nothing more in that moment than to get away. "I'd better go check on Maddie and Clare," I said, shakily getting up to my feet. "Thanks for everything. I'm sorry I had to ruin all your plans for a great first date."

He stood, too, and squeezed my hand softly. "I don't want you to worry about that," he said. "Forget about everything that happened after we left the restaurant, okay? I'll see you tomorrow at school."

Standing on my tiptoes, I wrapped my arms around his neck and he curled his arms around my waist, and we hugged quickly before pulling apart and heading towards the front door. When I glanced out into the moonlight and saw cars streaming by on the road in front of the house, panic set in the pit of my stomach again, but I forced myself to breathe as I let Cameron out and locked the door behind him.