My Own Kind of Chemo -On Wait Till Further Notice -

Chapter Three

A/N: I apologize for such a short filler v.v but it's something

Song for this Chapter -WET: I Don't Wanna Be 

Duke~

I could hear Linda in the background, trying to calm the crowd, trying to keep the order. I could hear Neal trying to hold back Bec so she wouldn't storm off into the crowd and strangle Mike where he stood. And most of all I could hear the pain of heartbreak pounding in my ears. 

Images of Mike and I flashed in my mind as I let the tears stream. I relived every fight, every "I love you", every memorable moment that we shared together as I ignored everyone while making my way down the hall. When I got to the dressing room I was going to grab my things and leave, I was going to go home and I was going to lock myself in my room and eat ice cream, but when I reached the doorway I froze. I couldn't help but break all over again as I watched my daughter with her stuffed rabbit. 

Parker sat on the nasty cream colored couch with Hunter laying next to her as she made her little bunny dance across the back of it. She was singing the song that I sang to her when she would pad into me and Mike's room, tears blurring her vision after a nightmare. I hadn't noticed that she had seen me until I felt her little hand grab mine, tugging gently to get my attention. 

"Papa, why are you crying?" Her voice was small but filled with concern. She shouldn't have to be worrying about things like this, she shouldn't be worrying about me. 

I tried my best to force a smile, only to have my bottom lip tremble and the tears blur my vision once more. "Papa is just upset, Sweetie, don't worry about me. Now, go get your things ready, we're going to leave early tonight." I talked down, trying my best to keep my voice even as I fixed her cute pink sundress that Linda had bought her earlier this month.

 She looked up at me, her brown eyes gazing at me brightly. "What about Daddy?" As the words left her lips I felt my heart drop, each piece falling to my feet like they were made of lead. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, let alone say to my daughter. How was one supposed to tell their child that their father was a cheating bastard? In nicer words, of course, or maybe just lie about the whole thing..... Yeah, that could work.

"Daddy is going out with friends tonight, he'll come home when he's done." I stood up, patting Hunter's head gently as I do. Though I could feel my knees threaten to buckle as Parker's voice reached my ears. Her voice no longer held as much concern as it did hurt, I could tell that the tears were slowly swelling in her eyes by the gentle crack on the last of her words.

"But you and Daddy said we would go eat ice cream after the show for my birthday..."

I knew I wouldn't be able to hold myself together if I tried to explain to her, and apologize to her for him, so I quickly threw out a simple, easy lie. I had told her that I had lied about Mike going out with friends, that he was going to get her birthday gift and he would be back tomorrow with it. When I saw her eyes light up and a pearly white grin flash itself at me, I knew we had to leave. About that time, just as I was pushing back towards the door to get her things from the other room, Linda walks in. 

I could tell by the look in her eyes that she wanted to say something, wanted to try and comfort me but I just shook my head and told her to watch Parker as I moved out the door. I had walked down the hall a door and walked in, ready to find Parker's toys on the floor along with a few of Hunter's, but instead I found Bec with the bags setting at her feet. With that sight I knew I couldn't handle the pain any longer. I had quickly shut the door behind myself as I rush into the room, wrapping arms around her in time for my body to tremble with sobs. I felt her fingers trail gently over my back, her cheek pressed against the side of my head and she cooed softly. Our bodies swayed slightly as she did her best to comfort me while I shook with the almost unbearable pain of a broken heart.

Not only was I heart broken, but I was going to be a single parent. I would have to raise Parker on my own while doing shows, because no way in hell will I let Mike take my little girl away from me. The idea of not being able to give Parker the love and attention she deserved made the sobs rattle my body even harder. She would probably asked about Mike as well, probably not as much now as she will in the future. Parker will never have a normal life, and even now, the famous life she lived wasn't going to be the same again. 

I stayed like that with Becca for awhile before finally pulling myself together enough to grab the bags, pulling open the door. I was going to make it work though, I was going to try my hardest to give Parker the life she deserved, even if it meant giving up singing. 

Picture on the side is Parker