Endless || HS ✔️

Prologue

It's very difficult to cope with leaving someone. So fucking hard. You leave that person saying you won't be back for good, but you do want to come back. Your mind is telling you one thing, while your heart is telling you something else.

I think that's how I felt about Harry Styles. My mind was telling me to stay, but my heart was telling me to leave. To get away.

I honestly think I had been planning to leave for a long time. I don't think it was just Harry. He had a part in it, but not the whole thing. I think I was just sick of all the fucking drama. I was sick of Veronica, the deaths, the secrets, the truth. I couldn't handle it anymore, so I went out of the limit.

The thing is, right now, I'm seeing that person for the first time in front of my eyes. The person that I left to get better, they are right in front of my eyes. In reality, not just on television screens or anything like that.

Harry Styles is right in front of me after a year.

I haven't seen him at all. When I left him, I didn't wait to see if he would come after me. I just left. I didn't want to be waiting, that's not what I was about or what I do. I don't wait. I just leave.

I hadn't talked to Harry since I left, though. I had heard things about him, with his game and all, but I hadn't had a conversation with him since our last fight. And I didn't want to. I was better off without him, it seemed. But, was I?

I just, I don't know. Many things have changed. Good and bad. Harry doesn't even know, not many people know.

I wish Harry would have just taken my answers. I wish he wouldn't have gone into detail or kept annoying the hell out of me, just to get an answer. But, the things is, I know how he felt. That's how I was to him when he got drunk on New Years.

I bombarded him with questions when he was drunk and I guess I shouldn't have. I still haven't figured out what the hell was wrong with him that night.

Maybe I can figure out Harry Styles one day and who he is.