Chapter 1

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Tristan Price as Alonzo

Today was the day. The day I took over my own life. The day I came out to my parents and told them they can no longer control my life. This was the day, and I was ecstatic.

Throughout all of my 18 years, I was only my happiest when I performed, but my dad wasn't having it, 'you're gonna take over the company' he always told me, as if I didn't have a choice. But I did, and I was gonna make sure they knew that.

I was not going to college,I was not going to take over the company, I was gonna perform, sing, and do what makes me happy, because I had the right to do that, right? I hope my parents agree, but before I can do all that, I have to go to the studio and get my copy of some songs I've done so they can at least hear me out. If this goes as planned I won't have to go sneak off to some rinky-dink studio in what my parents call a 'dangerous and unsafe' part of town.

Looking into the mirror, I give myself one last once over and whisper to myself, "you can do this."

"Do what?" My younger sister, Char asks me.

Resisting my bodies urges to panic, I take a deep breath and focus on my calming my heart rate.

"Sorry big brudda, I didn't mean to scare you." She says shyly.

"It's ok. Why aren't you going to Lily's house?" I say while signing the words at the same time so she doesn't have to struggle to read my lips.

"I'm going out again, so tell mom and dad that I left so they don't worry, ok?"

"Yes, big brudda!" She chants causing me to smile while standing up straight.

Reggie's POV

"Yes ma, I know." I deadpan as my mother gives me my daily lecture.

"If you knew, I wouldn't be repeating myself, now would I?" She replies sassily. Putting her hands on her hips and all." Like I said Reg, stay out of those streets. They only lead to a shit life and a lifetime of trouble. Mama's only doing thus because I love you, and I don't want police at my door telling me my son is dead." She pleads desperately.

"Ma, how are we gonna pay bills then, I have to do this. I have to go out on the streets and do things that lead to a 'shit life and a lifetime if trouble." I reply regretful.

"Boy don't be cursing in my house, damn what's wrong with you!" She says while slapping the back of my head.

"Ma you just cursed." I deadpanned.

"Boy I'm grown! Now don't sass me boy! And don't think thus conversation is over.

"Yes ma'am." I say while leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

My mom's words stuck with me during the whole drive to the drug house. I knew I had to stop this, stop causing my mom stress. I claim to have done this so she didn't have to stress but it seems to only have caused more. I know my mom's worst fear, having to bury her own son and I pray she never does but bills have to be paid, Amari needs to be fed. She needs school supplies and all this stuff and it's not gonna fall out the sky. It's not gonna fall in my hands, I have to work hard for everything I get, and selling drugs might be the cost but I'd sacrifice myself for my family a thousand times over.

When I arrive, I'm greeted by none other than Keke, the ex that doesn't understand what no means.

"Hey sexy, crawling back already?" She taunts when I pass by.

"Did hell freeze over already?" I reply back teasingly and keep walking.

"You know you want this, any man is lucky to have allll this!" She yells seductively while Rubbing over her whole body.

"Look women! No offense but I wouldn't get with you to repopulate the earth, so spread your legs elsewhere!" I yell causing all seductive-ness to diminish into nothing as she gets serious.

"Aye yo Reg! What's good my brother?!"

"Nothing much Dee, what's been happening 'round here? I ask him taking in the odd silence going through the house.

"North side made another attack, they jumped Cj on the corner he was working 2 days ago." He says while balling his fist harshly.

"What's the plan?" I ask, knowing there's gonna be some type of retaliation for this.

"We gotta ask Ty man, you know ion yell the orders I just follow."

"Like the lil lap dog you are." I tease him while smirking.

"You say that now, but when he holds a gun to your head for losing 5 dollars from the weed sells, you'll make sure you don't fuck up again." He says defensively.

"Whatever. You got some more beats, I've been working on some songs." I ask hoping he does, one thing about Dee is that he got the sickest beats you'll ever hear, which is one of the main reason's I'm glad I got him as a friend."

"You already know my brotha!! I gotchu!" He says cockily.

After a couple hours in the studio, I make my way home, knowing if I'm late Ma gon worry.

"Boy, I was this close to going up to that house of hooligans and acting a straight damn fool." She says while indicating how close she was.

"I wasn't even up there, I was at the studio." I defend with my straightest face I can muster because, in reality, I did go up there, and I did what she hated so much.

"You were?" She says looking up with a look of hope in her eyes. "You know I love when you work on your music Reg, that's what you should be doing, making a name for yourself through music, not in the streets selling drugs." She says strictly.

"I know ma." I reply drained from the day.

"Don't you 'I know ma' me! If you knew you'd stop." She scolds.

"Yea ok, night ma."

As tired as I thought I was, I couldn't get a second of sleep. I lied to ma, again. It was eating away at me, like termites to wood, and it wasn't going to be long until I was a weak, brittle, toothpick. They were gonna find out soon, all of them were gonna find out, and I'd be looked at differently, and was it selfish to want things to stay just like they were.

And then there was Ty, he would probably be the angriest of them all. He was going to be angry I lied to him, mad that me, his right hand, most trusted man, wanted to leave the streets behind.

As much as I praised myself for being the 'thug' I was, I was nothing like I portrayed myself as. I was a closeted, scared, lonely person, and that's what scared me. Why when it came to this one tiny subject, I was weak, unable to speak words, unable to function? Because it scared me, which is why I buried it like it was a dead body never to be seen again, but the tide was becoming lower, revealing the body for all the world to see.

"I'm gay."

Saying those words out loud scared me more than anything, and I couldn't do anything about it.

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