Chapter One: Without You.
"Sing something new, I have nothing left, I can't face the dark without you. There's nothing left to lose, the fight never ends, I can't face the dark without you."~Breaking Benjamin
Three Years Earlier:
The harsh wind blew my short brown hair into my face. I looked down at the tombstone in front of Lyla's grave. Tears rolled down my face and fell onto the rain wet ground as I held onto the black umbrella. Lyla's parents stood across the gave from me, not shedding a single tear. Those Bastards. They had hated her so much and been the death of her, but yet they still had the decency and audacity to come to her funeral. I wanted to kill them both, though I know that Lyla would never want me too. Besides they were on probation, almost killing me didn't let them of easy. But that's the only reason they were still living, Lyla. The kindest and most sweet person I had ever met in my entire life. She was my sister and I was her keeper, but I had let off my duty for one second and now where is she? Dead. And it's all my fault. I had promised to go and see her that day, but I hadn't been able to because I had confronted my mum. She had yelled and slapped me, not allowing me to go see her. I ran out the door after she had slapped me, running down the blocks to Lyla's.
I remember seeing her parents car hoping Lyla was with them. They pulled up next to me and I didn't see her. "Where's Lyla?" I persisted trying to catch my breath. They smiled viciously and her mum said, "We hope she's dead, she should be. She's no better than a fucking piece of shit." Her dad nodded as she talked. I slapped both of them, hard. "You'll pay for that, bitch." They screamed at me. I began to ran and they chased after me. I ran past their house and into the woods behind. I sprinted harder and faster than I ever could, only thinking about how every second Lyla could be slowly dying. Just thinking about it made me run even more harder. I had to get to her, before it was too late.
As I ran, I saw what looked like a faint shadow in front of me. Thinking it's her, I run harder and faster, though my heart seems like it's about to explode. Suddenly, the shadow disappears and an impulsive scream rips out of me. I reach the end of the woods, a cliff stretching far down below. I crumple to my knees, convulsing sobs hitting my body, screams never ending, and tears flowing down into the chasm below. All too soon Lyla's parents come running up, satisfied looks upon their faces. "I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE AND GO TO HELL!" I screamed at them as they approached. That didn't stop them from grabbing me, throwing punches to my gut and face. All I could do was sit there, hoping they killed me. I had failed Lyla, and it was all my fault for her dying. I heard her voice saying, "Fight back, please, for me." I immediately began to fight back, hoping to stay alive...anything for Lyla.
Just as I was beginning to win, though, her mum began to strangle me. Tears came into my eyes, my head shaking the little that it could to give a simple answer, no. Her mum's malicious smile finally coming out, she said, "I told you, you would pay. Pay for everything, everything piece of pain that you have inflicted on us. Not letting that child die whenever we told her, being her friend, helping her recover from our beatings of words, Everything." My vision began to get blurry, my throat so tight I didn't that it could get any tighter. My breath started to run out into to short gasps. I was dying, I thought to myself. The tears that had came to my eyes earlier, actually seemed to burn my face, melting it away. I saw my life come and go in a single clip and a white light coming towards me. Just when I thought it was going to take me though, it passed me and onto the souls further away. I'm in heaven, I thought to myself, but in truth there was only reaccuring darkness.
I felt a jab of pain in my back, as if someone or something had stabbed me. I could suddenly see through my real eyes again, and I could breath, but not very well. I saw Lyla's mum being dragged back by somebody. Was that a cop, and was that an Ambulance? I was now crazy, just great. Add that to the list of things people call me now. But as I felt a stretcher being put under me I realized that I was not crazy, in fact I was mostly sane. I felt really tired and I just wanted to go to sleep. Then I began to see visions of Lyla shaking her head, No I mustn't go to sleep. I promised Lyla that I wouldn't die. But as soon as they put the mask on me, everything became dark.
After I got to the hospital, I believe and hope I got to the hospital, lots of things were fuzzy. My previous life, My parents and family, but the only thing was clear. Lyla was dead. Every time I heard someone speak the words, however much my body wanted to deny it, I knew it was true. It was my bloody fault she was dead. I shouldn't have confronted my mum like that, it was reckless and stupid. I even had a scar from where she slapped me(she had had a bottle cap in her hand and it had cut me under my lip). It was all my fault she was dead, and I would never forgive myself for it.
I stood by her grave, watching as people put flowers by it. When It was my turn I went up and kissed her grave and set down a Lily. Attached to it was a little laminated note:
Dear Little Lily Lyla,
I decided to give you your favorite flower in hopes that you might forgive me for not being there when you needed me most. I'm sorry I let you die. I should have been there. I'm so sorry sister.
I love you,
Your sister and keeper.
I walked away from the grave and stood in my spot until the funeral was over. Once everyone had left, I went to the grave and cried for what seemed like hours, the rain pouring onto me. Once the tears ran out, I stood and kissed her grave one last time. Without you Lyla my world is a living hell, I have really no reason to live, but because you have asked me I will stay, at least for a little while.
