Roll the Dice

twenty-one. more i cannot wish you

I was practically shaking in my sandals.

(But for real-it was creepy. I'd never seen them so...united. Cara usually always complained about Dacey and her sentimentality, and Dacey usually showered excessive love on Cara just for the hell of it.)

"Guys, come on," I groaned. I caught sight of a waitress walking by in her apron and waved a hand to get her attention. Once she came over with a nod and an expectant smile, I said, "One large strawberry banana milkshake, please. On my tab too."

Once she walked away, I turned back and raised my eyebrows at Dacey. "Will you please shut up now?"

I was still painfully aware of how my cheeks still felt pretty much as warm as they were before I borrowed the waitress as a diversion from Cara and Dacey's weird Dom discussion. And oh, my cheeks warmed up even more although I hadn't even gotten the chance to cool down yet. Sometimes, I wished that my cheeks were like a broken computer-after overheating, they would most likely shut down or at least stop getting warmer.

Dacey shook her head at me, eyes twinkling.

There was a moment of silence as the three of us looked at each other. I felt like they were my parents and I was the rebel child who'd managed to fail all my classes from the way the two of them were staring me down. It wasn't fair. It really wasn't.

Finally, I'd had enough, and I slammed my fork down on my plate. Even though I hadn't created the booming, thudding sound that I'd been going for, I supposed that was as much noise as I could possibly create and raised my eyebrows at the two of them. "All right: I'll admit it. Friends aren't supposed to kiss and act totally casual after it. But we kissed, and afterwards, it was like absolutely nothing happened. So there!"

I leaned back in my seat.

I knew the two of them well enough to not deceive myself into thinking that could indulge their questions.

But again, I really was hoping that I didn't have to keep discussing Dom when he was obviously my weak spot. Why did they never choose to have a conversation concerning my strong points? I could go on and on about Guys and Dolls, not the complexity and multi-faceted implications behind my relationship with Dom.

"Does Dom think about it that way?" Cara pointed out. She took a sip from her glass of orange juice. "That's the important part."

I held my hands up. "I don't know; I don't know!" My voice grew higher with each word I spoke. "He was the one who just smiled at me and sat there for the rest of the movie after the incident! I mean, I'm not stupid to think that absolutely nothing has changed, but-"

"Lottie, darling," interrupted Dacey, who put a hand on my shoulder like she was my older sister (when in actuality, I was about four months older than she was), "chill. You're not helping yourself."

I poked her right back, feeling a little like a hysterical child who'd overdosed on Pixie Sticks. "And you're not helping too," I retorted, "by pointing out everything that I didn't want to talk about!"

Cara wagged her finger at me. "But you need this. You've already gone through enough denial."

"Stop it!"

"We're just trying to help you," said Dacey in her most calming voice. It didn't really work since I knew well that she mostly used that voice to calm down fussing babies or out-of-control cocker spaniels. "How about you start thinking about it that way?"

"No."

"Lottie," Cara and Dacey said at the same time.

"No."